From: JumperChick@aol.com
Date: Tue, 8 Aug 2000 19:33:50 EDT
Subject: "Nova" (1/1)
Source: direct

Part 34
Day 204 (continued)
Mulder pressed his smiling lips to Scully's. "Thank 
you." He breathed, resting his forehead against hers. 

"Thank you?" She asked with amusement. 

"Yes, thank you." Was all he said before kissing her 
again. Without letting go he reached behind her and 
opened their door, backing her slowly in. 

Scully giggled a soft uncharacteristically giddy 
giggle against his lips. She couldn't explain this 
feeling if she had to. It was impossible. She was 
happy, beyond belief, and nervous for some reason. 
As a child Scully dreamed of the day she would 
marry. In college she went through the phase of 
thinking she didn't want to. Then in medical school, 
learning about the development of children and how 
amazing it all was, to put it simply, she wondered 
how she would be able to juggle a family and the 
career as a doctor. When she joined the FBI she 
became married to her work-to Mulder is an abstract 
way. She stopped believing that the typical family 
life was possible for her. Now what she was going to 
have would be anything other then typical. A miracle 
baby and married to the only man she could ever 
love. "I deserve this." She whispered against 
Mulder's lips, without realizing it, as the back of her 
knees hit the bed. 

Mulder pulled back slightly, helping to lower her on 
to the bed. "I don't." He said humbly as he settled on 
his side next to her. 

"You don't what?" 

He pulled his shirt over his head to stop Scully's 
insistent tugging. "I don't deserve you." 

"Don't start with that." Her voice slightly muffled as 
she pulled her own shirt off. "You do too deserve 
this." Scully took his face in her hands, forcing him 
to look at her. "We both do. We have fought for this, 
cried and mourned for this, and quite literally shed 
blood for this." 

Mulder fell motionless, his hands locked in their 
cradle around Scully's face, his body leaning gently 
against hers. "So much has been taken from you-from 
both of us. We've changed so much." He paused for a 
moment, taking her body in with his eyes, letting 
them linger on her belly.

An uncontrollable smile spread across Scully's face. 
She let her hands wonder over the thick muscles of 
his arms and back as a response.

"We've come a long way. And we do deserve this." 
Mulder said on a sudden whim of self-approval. 
Scully nodded slowly. For everything they had done, 
for everything they were doing and everything they 
would do, they were entitled to the pleasures of the 
other's body, mind and spirit. "We do." She agreed 
softly. "For the rest of our lives." His lips crushed 
hers before the words completely left her mouth. 

Day 205
Mulder stepped out of the Church with a determined 
stride, trying his damnedest not to grin like a fool. He 
wasn't doing well.

"Mulder?" 

He spun around, a little too quickly, and almost 
knocked Marsha off her feet. "Oh, sorry." Mulder 
said quickly, trying to shake his thoughts away. 
"What can I do for you, Marsha?"

"My chimney is a little clogged, could you help my 
husband clean it out?"

Mulder sucked in a long breath. "Can't Skinner do 
it?"

She shook her head. "He just left to help fix the 
wagon of firewood that broke down. He won't be 
back for hours."

"That's right, its over ten miles away." Mulder said 
offhandedly under his breath. "Ok. Let's go do 
this." Mulder said directing Marsha toward her 
family's room.

****
"Have you seen Mulder?"

Randy shook his head at Scully. "Sorry, no."

Scully wrinkled her nose in frustration. Mumbling 
her thanks she continued down the hallway towards 
the Main Room. She had been looking for what 
seemed like hours, it only seemed that way because 
she couldn't move fast enough for her convenience. 
Scully rounded the corner into the Main Room and 
smacked right into someone. "Oof!"

She was righted before she fully lost her balance by 
two hands on her elbows. "Whoa. There you are." 

Mulder said with a chuckle. "I've been looking for 
you."

Scully smiled up at him. "I think we have been 
chasing each other around Nova most of the day."

Mulder made an agreeable noise as he steered her 
through the room. "I talked to Father Ryan today, 
he's waiting for us." 

"Wait." Scully stopped and turned to look up at him. 
"Today? We are going to get married TODAY?"

Mulder's jaw worked for a moment before words 
came out. "But. I thought, I'm sorry, Scully. I just 
thought when I asked you, right away was ok.. Is it 
ok?"

"Yes!" She said quickly. "I just didn't realize." 
Scully took his hand, squeezing it once she tugged 
him toward the Church again. "Come on. Let's do 
this." 

With a smile Mulder wrapped his arm around 
Scully's waist as they entered the empty room. 
"Father Ryan?" Mulder called towards the closed 
door of the confessional knowing Father Ryan spent 
much of the day in the small room waiting. 

The older man stepped out with a smile. "Dana, I see 
Mulder finally tracked you down."
Scully nodded, biting her lip nervously. 

The priest directed them over to the front of the room 
as he sorted through books. "Mulder told me that you 
both decided for the ceremony to just be the two of 
you." 

"Yes." Scully took Mulder's hand and gave it a firm 
excited squeeze. "It seems right that way."

"I understand." Father Ryan stood up with a thick old 
book in his hands. "Shall we begin?" 

Mulder and Scully exchanged glances before 
nodding. 

"All right." Father Ryan started. "I'll begin with a 
prayer: Loving God, I thank you for the gift of life 
you gave and continue to give to me and to all of us. 
Merciful God, I ask your pardon and forgiveness for 
my own failure and the failure of all people to respect 
and foster all forms of life in our universe. Gracious 
God, I pray that with your grace, I and all people will 
reverence, protect, and promote all life and that we 
will be especially sensitive to the life of the unborn, 
the abused, neglected, disabled, and the elderly. I 
pray, too, that all who make decisions about life in 
any form will do so with wisdom, love, and courage. 
Living God, I praise and glorify you as Father, 
Source of all life, as Son, Savior of our lives, and as 
Spirit, Sanctifier of our lives. Amen." Father Ryan 
paused for a moment as they echoed his last word. 
"Dana, Mulder, you are both strong people. With 
wonderful souls, you have given me hope for Nova 
with the hope you have shown other people in their 
errors. Together you will only be stronger. Although 
marriage is not a legal title in the Nova community it 
is more important to be bonded in this way for your 
hearts. I believe you both already have this bond, 
therefore I would like to give you both a moment to 
express your feelings to each other before you are 
joined in God's eyes." He turned to Scully. "Dana."

Scully turned to Mulder and met his moist eyes, 
interlocking their fingers. "Mulder. There are no 
words to describe how I feel about you, but I think- I 
know you understand it. You have given me so much, 
you have finally learned that everything I have given 
up and lost, everything we both have lost, has lead up 
to this moment. It has been worth the pain for 
everything we have now. We deserve this." Scully 
ended with the statement she realized they should 
have learned to say many years ago.

"Mulder, anything you want to add?"

Mulder didn't break eye contact with Scully, he let 
his heart speak. "You are everything to me, Scully. I 
have said it before and I will say it a million times 
more until the day I die." He shook his head in self 
amusement. "The only other thing I have to say it that 
I love you."

"I love you too." Scully added softly. Father Ryan 
passed the open book to Scully, signaling her to read 
the passage. "I Dana Scully, take you to be no other 
than yourself, loving what I know of you, trusting 
what I do not yet know. I will be true to you in all 
things, I will share what I have and who I am, I will 
love enough to risk being hurt, trust in joy, and 
receive you as my equal, through all our years, and in 
all that life may bring us."

Mulder took the offered book from Scully's hands. "I 
Fox Mulder, take you to be no other than yourself, 
loving what I know of you, trusting what I do not yet 
know. I will be true to you in all things, I will share 
what I have and who I am, I will love enough to risk 
being hurt, trust in joy, and receive you as my equal, 
through all our years, and in all that life may bring 
us."

"Be appeased," Father Ryan began. "What greater 
thing is there for two human souls than to feel that 
they are joined for life - to strengthen each other in 
all labor, to rest on each other in all sorrow, to 
minister to each other in all pain, to be one with each 
other in silent, unspeakable memories at the moment 
of the last parting." He smiled at them both. "For sake 
of tradition. You may kiss the bride." 

Mulder slowly took Scully's face in his hands, 
leaning in just as slowly his pressed his lips against 
hers for an endless moment. 
 
 Part 35
Day 206
"Ok, what is this all about?" Frohike asked Skinner 
when he walked into their room.

Skinner shrugged. "All I know is Mulder wanted to 
met us." He trailed off as Amanda entered the 
room. She immediately turned her face away from 
him and stood at the far side of Byers' room. Skinner 
let out a long breath, rolling his shoulders and trying 
to relax. He was desperate. Every time he tried to talk 
to 
Amanda she would blow up at him and refuse to 
speak. Skinner tried to tell himself it was time to 
move on, but it didn't seem possible, he wasn't ready 
to give up. He turned his focus towards the doorway 
as Mulder ushered Scully in, her cheeks were slightly 
flushed and they were both smiling. 

"What has gotten into you two?" Langly looked at 
them suspiciously. 

Mulder and Scully exchanged glances. "We got 
married yesterday." Mulder blurted out happily.

"Huh?" Frohike spoke up from the back of the room. 

Scully quickly explained the small ceremony, 
apologized for not inviting anyone, and was 
immediately bombarded with words of 
congratulations and `it's about time's. After many 
moments of excited talking everyone took turns 
exiting the room to get started on the day's work. 

Skinner saw Amanda walking slowly down the 
hallway a few feet in front of him. He watched her 
walk ahead of him longingly. For years Skinner has 
been envious of Mulder and Scully's relationship, but 
this topped it off. With a determined intake of breath 
he strode up to Amanda's side. 

Amanda looked up at him with a frown. "What do 
you want Walter?"

"I was just hoping we could talk for a minute."

"There's nothing to talk about." 

"Amanda-"

"No, Walter." She interrupted, turning around to face 
him with a hand held up. "It's over. Accept it and 
move on." Amanda turned to and started to walk 
away.

"You can honestly say that Amanda?" He called after 
her, becoming louder as she moved farther away. 
"Turn around, look me in the eye and tell me it's 
over." Skinner ignored the questioning murmurs of 
the bystanders. "Amanda, ignoring me won't make 
me go away." She still hadn't responded as she 
rounded the corner and went out of sight. "I knew 
you couldn't." Skinner whispered to himself.

Day 209
"My back hurts." Scully mumbled as she shifted in 
her chair at the medical room. 

Amanda looked over with a soft smile. "But you are 
having a baby." She said in an envious tone.

Scully groaned. "Not soon enough. These next few 
months are going to kill me, I know it." She looked 
down at her stomach with a curious expression. "I 
don't think I can get any bigger, I'll be so off balance 
I'll be falling on my face all the time."

Amanda laughed as she sat down next to Scully. "But 
after these last few months you will have a little baby 
to take care of and raise."

Scully held up a hand to cut her off. "Please. I'm 
anxious enough about this whole thing, don't remind 
me."

"What are you talking about?" She asked with a 
laugh. "You and Mulder are going to be wonderful 
parents."

Scully sighed and ran her hands over her belly. 

"What are you worried about?" Amanda asked with 
serious interest. 

"So many things could go wrong. So many little 
things." Scully said softly, still looking at her 
midsection. "It's hard to explain." She looked up with 
a slightly embarrassed smile. "I hate to say it, but 
when you are pregnant yourself I think you will 
understand."

Amanda shook her head. "I don't think I will ever 
have a family."

Scully was silent for a moment. "Not even with 
Skinner?"

Amanda shifted uncomfortably. 

"You know he loves you. It's obvious."

"Dana." Amanda said firmly as she stood up. "With 
all due respect this is none of your business. But 
Walter and I are finished-"

"Why?" Scully asked quickly. "Why are you over? 
Where did things go wrong? He was there for you 
and you shut him out suddenly. I don't understand it 
and I don't think you do either. I used to do the same 
thing with Mulder, a long time ago. I didn't know 
why, I just did. Defense mechanism maybe. But I 
missed out on the chance to have a few more great 
years with him. I don't want you to make the same 
mistake."

"Thanks, but I'll live my own life." Amanda walked 
to the door and swung in open. "I'll be in my room if 
you need me for anything." The door slammed closed 
behind her. 

Day 218
"Mulder. what happened to you?" 

Mulder looked at her through strands of wet hair 
hanging over his forehead. "It's raining. sleeting. 
doing something cold and wet outside." 

Frowning Scully stood up and helped him pull his 
shirt off. "You are soaked. Take these wet clothes off 
and get by the fire before you come down with a 
cold."

"Yes, mom." He teased. 

Scully glared at him as he stooped to pull his jeans 
off. Once up right she dragged him by his arm to sit 
on the edge of the bed near the fire. Mulder rubbed 
his hands together trying to warm himself. "Why 
were you out there in this weather anyway?"

"Just to piss you off." He answered nonchalantly. 
"Ow!" He yelped while laughing, rubbing the back of 
his head where Scully smacked him. "We finished 
repairing the north barn. Almost finished in time, 
but.. obviously not completely."

Scully sat with her legs folded under her behind him 
and ran a dry towel over his damp shoulders and 
back. With a deep sigh he leaned back into Scully's 
warm touch. 

"Mulder. I need to talk to you about something." 
Scully said softly.

He groaned. "I hate when you start sentences off like 
that." Mulder turned to face her, spreading his legs so 
she was sitting, facing him, between them and leaned 
back on his hands. "Ok, shoot." 

Pressing her lips together she eyed him carefully for a 
silent moment. "I want you to deliver the baby."

Mulder tilted his head back and let out a loud laugh. 
"That's funny, Scully. Thanks, I needed a laugh." He 
shook his head at her, still chuckling. 

"Mulder, I'm serious." She said straight-faced. 

His face slowly went slack. Mulder swallowed 
thickly. "You're kidding." It wasn't a question, it was 
a hopeful statement. 

She shook her head slowly. "I'm serious. I want you 
to do this."

Mulder shook his head firmly. "No way, Scully. No 
way, no how. Not going to happen." He carefully slid 
off the bad and paced the room. 

"Mulder-"

"I can't believe you would ask me something like 
that." He mumbled in shock. 
Scully shifted to hang her legs over the side of the 
bed. "There's no one else to do it."

"That's not true." 

"Yes it is!" Scully struggled not to become defensive. 
"*I* delivered the two babies born earlier-"

"Judy helped you." He interrupted. 

Scully rolled her eyes. "Barely."

"Amanda can do it. She's been working with you for 
a while now."

"Mulder!" She said in an agitated tone. "She just 
learned how to stitch! She can't deliver the baby." 

"I don't even know how to do that!"

Scully crossed her arms and scowled at him. 
"Mulder.. I want you to do this for me. You'll do 
fine. You can handle blood. sort of. And I trust you, 
I need that. I can't have just anyone delivering the 
baby."

Mulder sighed. "Scully.. I can't do that. What if 
something goes wrong?"

She motioned for him to come out of the corner he 
was currently cowering in. When he stood in front of 
her she took his hands and pulled him down onto his 
knees in front of her. "If something goes wrong I will 
talk you through it." Scully massages his bare 
shoulders with her hands, he was tense and had the 
look of a frightened animal in his eyes. 

"But what if you can't? Then what?"

She laughed softly. "Mulder you have read every 
single page about pregnancy in every single book in 
Nova, I'm sure you have read about anything that 
could possibly happen."

"That's what scares me!" He exclaimed. "I wouldn't 
know what to do."

"No one else here would either. I want you to do this 
for me Mulder. Please." She leaded in closer to him, 
looking him directly I the eyes.

"Scully. I can't."

She slid her hands up from his shoulders to cup his 
face. "Yes you can. I need you to do this." She 
whispered. 

"Why? Why is it so important that I deliver our 
baby."

Scully smiled softly. "You just answered your own 
question. Our baby."

Mulder shook his head in confusion. 

Scully spoke very slowly and deliberately. "I want 
you to be the first person to lay hands on our child." 
Mulder smiled involuntarily at the thought. "And I 
want the baby to go directly from your arms to my 
own. No one else's. Do you understand what I 
mean?"

He nodded after a moment. "I do."

"Will you do it? Please, for me and for our baby?" 
Scully pleaded him with her voice and with her eyes. 

With a smile he nodded. "Yes, I'll do it." 
 
Part 36
Day 225
Rolling over, still half asleep, Mulder swung his arm 
out expecting to find Scully on the other side of the 
bed. He opened his eyes, just to quickly close them 
again, Scully already had all the lamps on in their 
room but she wasn't in there. For a moment, a very 
short moment, he debated in getting out of bed to find 
her. But he was too comfortable and his body felt like 
jelly. Promising himself to get up in a few minutes, 
Mulder settled deeper into the pillows. It was Sunday 
and he was in no hurry, if someone needed him they 
would come get him. 
 
Mulder jerked away from his almost-sleep at the 
sound of the door opening. 

"Morning, Sunshine." Scully greeted with mock 
enthusiasm as she sat on the edge of the bed. 

Groaning in response Mulder hoisted himself up on 
his elbow and watched as Scully took peanuts, one by 
one, out of a jar in her hand and popped them into her 
mouth. "Who's cabinet did you raid this time?" 

"Byers'." She answered without taking her eyes off 
of the bounty in her hands. "He doesn't mind."

"Of course he doesn't." Mulder mumbled as he 
flopped back down onto the bed. 

"What do you mean by that?" Scully asked around a 
peanut. 

He smiled. "Nothing."

Scully glared at him before returning her focus to the 
food with a "Whatever" muttered under her breath. 

Bending his leg, Mulder nudged her back with his 
foot to try to get her attention. 

"Knock it off." She swatted his foot with one hand 
behind her back. 

Mulder pushed himself up to a sitting position and 
leaned forward to kiss Scully's neck. She smiled and 
arched her neck to give him move room, but 
continued eating her peanuts. He suckled her ear lobe 
into her mouth, while watching her reaction out of 
the corner of his eye. After a moment he pulled away 
and rested his chin on her shoulder. "Are you paying 
any attention to me at all?"

"I'm hungry." She answered simply. 

"So am I." He responded biting her earlobe.

Scully barked out laughter and turned to look at him. 
"You've got to be kidding me!"

Mulder looked offended for a moment before 
shrugging and moving to sit behind her, pulling her 
back against his chest as he leaned against the wall. "I 
tried." He muttered as he wrapped his arms around 
her waist and settled he cheek on against hers, feeling 
the slight movements as she chewed and swallowed. 
She ate in silence for another few moments before 
she eyes lost focus and she became motionless except 
for breathing. "Scully?" Mulder watched her for a 
response. "Scully are you with me?" He sat up, barely 
catching her upper body as it fell slack without his 
support. 

Scully jerked with a sharp breath as she blinked for 
the first time in a few minutes. 

"Hey? What was that about?" Mulder asked angling 
himself to see her face better. 

Scully shook her head to orientate herself. "Sorry." 
She mumbled. "I guess I zoned out for a minute." 

Day 230
"How long do you think it will take before we are 
bored with this?" Mulder asked conversationally as 
he threw his ante rock into the center of the table. 

Frohike looked up from seriously contemplating his 
cards. "We could always play Go Fish."

"When I was a kid I used to think it was Gold Fish, 
not Go Fish." 

Everyone looked at Langly. "Thanks for sharing." 
Skinner said with mock seriousness. 

"What's wrong with sharing?" This time everyone 
stared at Byers in confusion. "We never talk about 
anything serious. We just sit here, play poker, and 
talk about random things.. Never anything 
substantial." 

"Oh forget it." Byers said after spending a few 
moment with everyone just staring at him. 

"No." Skinner said slowly. "He's right."

"I don't want to talk seriously." Mulder spoke up. 
"Don't we deal with enough stressful issues during 
the day, Skinner? I just want to sit here and not 
think." 

Skinner nodded as he considered Mulder's words. 
"Yeah. but still. Come on, Mulder, you're the 
psychologist. Talking is good, right?"

He grumbled a positive response. 

"So what serious business should be talk about?" 
Byers asked with interest. 

Skinner focused on his cards as he shuffled with great 
concentration. 

"Still having problems with Amanda I take it." 

Skinner shot a hard look at Frohike. "Forget I said 
anything."

"No way!" Langly said with a laugh. "You stressed 
that we need to really talk, so talk."

"I said never mind." Skinner hissed out. 

"Touchy subject?" Frohike asked as he leaned his 
elbows on the table to get closer to Skinner in 
interest. 

Mulder cleared his throat to get their attention. "I 
don't think this is any of our business, if he wants to 
share he can."

Langly sat back in his chair with a sulky frown. "Just 
when it was getting good you decide to take his side."

"You guys are just jealous cause you haven't gotten 
any since we got here. and who knows how long 
before that. I'll raise you." Mulder added quickly as 
he tossed a rock onto the small pile in the center of 
the table, ignoring the aggravated glares of the three 
men while Skinner tried to smoother is laughter. 

Day 234
"I'm tired." Scully grumbled as she crawled into bed. 

Mulder made an agreeable noise as he settled next to 
Scully, trapping her between his body and the wall. 

He opened his arm for her as she moved to set her 
head on his bisep. "Goodnight, Scully."

"Mmm." Was her soft response as sleep quickly took 
her over. 
 
***
Mulder grunted awake from a heavy weight on his 
stomach. He opened his eyes and struggled to focus 
in the dim light of the room. "Scully?" He asked her 
as she determinedly tried to climb her way out of bed, 
moving faster then was possible for her current 
condition. "Sweetheart, what's wrong?" He pushed 
himself to a sitting position, reaching out to take her 
arm. 

Scully quickly pulled herself from his grasp, almost 
causing herself to tumble off the bed. 

"Whoa." Mulder said securing her body with his 
hands on her shoulders. "Scully, what are you 
doing?" 

She struggled away from his hold, but Mulder moved 
out from under the blankets to follow her movements. 
With a frustrated noise deep in her throat she 
violently retched her body from him. 

"Scully!" Mulder struggled to stand up in time to 
block her obvious path to the door. "What has gotten 
into you?" 

"I have to go."
 
Part 37
Day 234 (continued)
"I have to go." Scully began to repeat softly under her 
breath as she struggled against Mulder's hold on her 
arms even as his heart shattered and his gut twisted in 
terror. Mulder needed to keep her here, he knew that 
much. He also knew last time this happened they 
were attacked, people needed to be warned, he 
needed to talk to Skinner. He couldn't do both. 

"Not again." Mulder prayer softly as he began to drag 
her back towards the bed. Scully fought against his 
arms, throwing Mulder off balance. "Scully, stop. 
Please." He begged in her ear as she pushed herself 
forward. Holding Scully only by her upper arms 
Mulder fell forward with her. To avoid falling on top 
of her he let go of one of her arms to brace them 
against the wall, but he didn't move in time and 
Scully's forehead hit with a sickening thud. Mulder 
jumped back from her. 

Scully wasted no time in staggering towards the door, 
unfazed by her injury, not noticing the trail of blood 
that was dripping into her eyes. 

For a short moment Mulder watched in shock. But as 
Scully pulled the door open he pushed himself from 
the wall, with a few strides he had caught her around 
the shoulders. 

Scully's muttering continued, rising in volume as she 
pulled and pushed and twisted against Mulder's hold. 

The hallway was empty in the early morning hours, 
but if Mulder didn't get her back into their room soon 
that could easily change. 

"Scully, please stop this." Mulder pleaded through 
clenched teeth as he tried to keep a grip on her small 
body. With a quick, regretful movement he shifted 
one arm around her waist, the other across her chest. 
Leaning his weight back he dragged Scully back into 
their room, kicking the door shut with a slam that 
made him jump, his grip loosening momentarily.

Scully's out of control mind used that short moment 
to twist in his arms, now facing Mulder. 

Though he tried, he couldn't pin her arms between 
them. Mulder barely caught the cry of pain in his 
throat as Scully dug her nails into his cheeks. He 
fought to shake her off while maintaining his hold. 
With an arm across her lower back he pulled her to 
him, belly to belly, then reached up with his other 
hand and grabbed both her wrists and hauled them 
away from his face. "Scully stop it" Mulder said 
firmly and loudly, hoping to break the spell slightly. 

She continued her utterances; "I have to go." And 
stared up at him with a glassy eyed blank stare. 
Mulder froze as watched her. She didn't look like 
herself, her eyes wide and dilated. Blinking in sync 
with the beginning of each sentence. Completely 
unchanged as she struggled and pulled from him. 

"Scully?" Mulder asked softly, studying her eyes for 
any response. "Scully, can you hear-" Mulder's 
sentence was cut off as Scully's hands, still encased 
in his, struck his cheekbone. He cried out in pain as 
he struggled to pull her hands low against his chest. 
Eyes stinging, Mulder looked down into Scully's 
unchanged eyes just as she pulled her hands up 
quickly, knocking Mulder under his chin. 

Mulder's head snapped back and blood filled his 
mouth. Involuntarily he released Scully, bringing a 
hand to his mouth to wipe away the blood. He 
watched, dazed, as Scully turned calmly and went 
towards the door. Quickly Mulder took a long step to 
catch up with her, grabbing her upper arms in his and 
pulling her back against his chest forcefully. Instantly 
she began to struggle. Mulder wrapped his arms 
securely around her body, pinning her arms down by 
her sides. 

She struggled for a moment.

"Stop it, Scully." Mulder hissed in her ear as he 
struggled to hold her carefully. He couldn't let 
himself slip and hurt her, but she was going to hurt 
herself the way she threw them around the room. The 
table toppled over with a clatter as she swung her 
legs out to kick at Mulder. He let out grunts of pain 
as her heels hit his knees, his shins, he cringed as her 
flailing legs hit the walls and furniture. 

Some how she managed to brace her feet securely on 
the floor. She pushed with all her strength back into 
Mulder. They both fell. Mulder's back landed hard 
against oak crib. The loud crunch of wood did 
nothing to drown out Mulder's curse as his back 
began to tingle and stars flew in front of his eyes. 

Scully stood, calmly and determinedly and made her 
way in even strides towards the doorway once again. 
Mulder watched, unable to move as his spine burned 
for a moment. Summoning the last of his strength he 
pushed himself from the splintered wood. He caught 
up with Scully just as she opened the door. Grabbing 
her quickly, and more roughly then he meant to, they 
both staggered back into the room. 

Scully threw her weight, left and right, back and 
forth. Until finally Mulder lost his balance again. As 
hard as he tried Mulder tumbled sideways, taking 
Scully with him. Both of their sides collided with the 
dresser, knocking it and them to the floor with a crash 
that could have been heard down the hall. 

Scully rolled out from under the clothes, other 
belongings and crushed wood trying to stand.

Mulder, willing himself to stand despite the pain 
radiating through his body, watched in horror as she 
went to stand. But collapsed back into the pile of 
rubble. His stomach twisted sickly as she tried again 
and again, but could not remain on her feet. 

"Scully." He choked out, crawling towards her. 
"Scully, come on back to me. Please."

"What the hell is going on?" Skinner bellowed from 
the open door as he looked around the room, settling 
his gaze on Mulder who knelt next to the doorway. 

"She's being called." 

Skinner looked to the center of the room where 
Scully struggled amongst the debris. 

"Help me up. We need to restrain her before she hurts 
herself anymore."

Skinner held out a hand and helped Mulder to his 
feet. He cringed and held his aching ribs before 
looking over to Scully. Both men froze. 

Slowly and carefully Scully stood, keeping most of 
her weight on one foot, her gun pulled from the pile 
on the floor raised. 

"Scully." Mulder whispered. "Don't do this."

Her blank eyes stared back at him, a slight sweat 
across her face mingling with blood. 

The gunshot echoed off the walls of Nova with 
deafening volume.

Part 38
Day 234 (continued) 
Mulder threw himself to ground as Skinner crumpled 
with a cry of pain beside him. He looked up to watch 
Scully mechanically turn to the aim the gun at him. 
At that moment Mulder forgot it was Scully who was 
holding the gun, she was a threat. A threat to his life 
and to others. Pushing himself from the ground he 
tackled Scully around the legs, pulling her to the 
floor beneath him. The gun skittered across the floor, 
bouncing off the walls until it was safely on the other 
side of the room.

"Oh my God. Walter!" Amanda shrieked as she 
pushed her way through the growing crowd in the 
hallway. She crouched by his groaning form, his 
hand instinctively pressed to his bleeding shoulder. 
"What the hell is going on?" She asked looking over 
her shoulder at Mulder who was wrestling with 
Scully on the ground, trying to pin her hands above 
her head. 

The Gunmen shoved aside the onlookers and stepped 
into the room with shocked expressions. 

"Someone, I need some help here." Mulder called 
over his shoulder as Scully twisted under him. 
Byers quickly made his way across the room, holding 
Scully's ankles with a look of bewilderment. 

"She's being called again." Mulder muttered under 
his breath, moving forward to straddle Scully's body 
trying not to put any weight on her as he battled with 
her hands. 

Amanda pushed Skinner's hands away and pressed 
hers the entry and exit wounds. "I have to get him to 
the Medical Room." 

"We'll help." Langly slapped Frohike's arm to get his 
attention as he watched Scully struggle on the floor. 
Quickly, but gently, they helped Skinner to stand and 
walk out into the hallway, shutting the door firmly 
behind them. 

"Let's get her on the bed." Mulder said in the 
strangely quite room, Scully's mutterings now a faint 
whisper. Byers picked Scully's legs up by under her 
knees while Mulder hoisted her upper body up. 
Stepping through the wreckage of the room the men 
quickly deposited Scully on the bed. Wordlessly, 
Byers found pieces of fabric to tie her hands with. 

Scully kicked and shifted against the bindings 
restlessly. Mulder tied her legs down. Still she 
fought, bucking up of the mattress and twisting. 

Mulder stepped back from the bed, tripping over a 
drawer, and placed his face in his hands. His body 
ached with fresh bruises, his muscles burned from 
holding Scully down, his head pounded and throbbed, 
and his heart was broken. 

"Are you ok, Mulder?" Byers prodded gently. 

With a nod he ran his hands down his face. 

Byers looked uncertainly between Scully and Mulder 
for a moment. "Now what?"

"Now we wait for the calling to end." Mulder 
answered matter of factly. "Can you go see how 
Skinner is doing?"

Nodding quickly Byers left Mulder alone. 

For a few long minutes Mulder did nothing but stare 
at Scully. Her voice had become hoarse and dry 
sounding with the nonstop murmuring. Streaks of 
blood stood out starkly all over her pale skin. Cuts 
and bruised marred her flesh. Her distant eyes 
watched him back calmly as the rest of her thrashed 
around continuously. 

***
"Don't move." Amanda told Skinner, for the third 
time, as she carefully looked at his wound. 

"Well if you would stop poking me I would stop 
moving." He grumbled. 

Amanda rolled her eyes as she examined the back of 
his shoulder. She knew his attitude was only because 
he was in pain. He never could admit when he was 
hurt. "Ok, I'm going to put you out so I can stitch this 
up. I don't think you are going to have any problems. 
All the books," She motioned to the pile on the table 
she had just finished looking through, "say this type 
of wound will heal just fine. Lay back." She helped 
him recline. Amanda smiled softly down at his 
worried and pained expression. "Don't worry, Walter. 
I'll talk to you soon." With that she placed the towel 
with chloroform over his mouth, slowly his eyes 
closed and his breathing relaxed. 

Day 235
Skinner groaned deeply as he tried to shift on his bed. 

"Lay still." Amanda said sitting next to him and 
placing a hand on his chest. 

He gave a weak nod and relaxed back into the sheets. 

"How do you feel?" She asked placing her hand on 
his forehead.

"I'm experiencing deja vu." 

For the first time in a long time Amanda shared a 
laugh with Skinner, it was a soft short lived laugh, 
but it was something. 

"Thank you, Amanda." Skinner said as she pulled 
away the bandages to look at his wound. 

She smiled shyly. "'I'm just doing my job Walter, 
nothing special."

"I've missed you, Mandy."

She looked away quickly. 

Skinner continued, encouraged that she hadn't 
brushed him off. "I think you have missed me too. 
We are good for each other."

"Walter. I." Amanda shook her head, not sure of 
what to say. 

He began to sit up, even as Amanda tried to push him 
back down, after a moment she ended up helping him 
upright to stop his struggle. "Give me one reason we 
shouldn't be together Amanda. One good reason and 
I'll leave it alone, I'll forget about it and move on." 
He watched her in silence for a moment, waiting for a 
response. "One reason, just one."

Slowly Amanda shook her head. "I don't have any 
reasons."

Skinner smiled at her as he nodded. 

***
Mulder's head lolled back in his chair, jerking him 
awake. Immediately he looked over at Scully. She 
had quieted hours ago, Amanda had come to clean 
and dress both of their wounds, the Gunmen had left 
him alone for the night, since then he had sat in 
silence with his eyes on Scully. Mulder dreaded the 
time when he would have to face everyone. People 
were talking and questioning, but no one was 
answering. The Gunmen had told everyone, at 
Mulder's request, that Mulder would explain 
everything soon.

He stretched his sore arms over his head with a 
groan. Even sitting at a distance Mulder could see the 
bruises on Scully's body, a slight trail of blood 
flowed from the bindings, various areas were covered 
with bandages. But she was quiet and breathing 
evenly. Approaching slowly, Mulder sat by her hip, 
placing his hand on her belly. 

He waited, holding his breath. 

Mulder waited until he had to take a breath or pass 
out. 

Part 39
Day 236
A small noise, only a slight movement really, woke 
Mulder. He lifted his head from his arms resting on 
the table and looked over at the bed. With a long 
breath of relief he saw Scully shifting, attempting to 
pull her hands down from the headboard. Quickly he 
rose, ignoring his stiff body, and sat on the edge of 
the bed. 

"Muld-" Scully broke off her hoarse whisper with a 
cringe as her body objected to her slight movement.

"Shh. I'll untie you." He said softly, hastily moving 
to untie her hands. Scully let out a small whimper as 
Mulder lowered her hands, swollen and bruised, to 
her lap. Soon her legs where freed. 

Slowly Scully managed to focus on Mulder's face 
with a gasp. "What happened to you? What happened 
to me?" 

He gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile 
and brushed hair from her forehead. "I'm ok. You 
were being called, you've been out for a few days 
now."

Scully just starred up at him confused. "I. did that 
to you?" Despite herself her chin trembled in horror.

"It's ok." He soothed quickly then gave her an 
ashamed and pained look. "I did a lot to you too."

Trying to absorb all this information into her hazy 
mind was impossible. She shook her head even 
though it hurt to do so. "I don't understand."

Mulder rubbed his face with his hands. He didn't 
know where to start. He didn't want to tell her 
everything that happened. "How are you feeling?"

Scully brought a hand up to her face, rubbing the heel 
into her forehead. "I don't know." She moved to sit 
up then grimaced and took a quick breath. 

"Take it easy." Mulder placed a hand under the back 
of her neck to help support her as she lowered her 
body back down. "Do you hurt anywhere?"

"Everywhere." She groaned. With a frown she ran her 
hands down her body, rubbing her stomach. Mulder's 
hands covered hers gently. After a moment she 
sighed and opened her eyes and looked up at him. 

"What exactly happened?"

He looked away, trying to find a way out of this 
conversation. 

"Mulder." She spoke in her warning voice. 

"I think you need to rest." He said quickly. 

Exhaustion was slowly taking her over. "I want to 
know, Mulder."

"I know." He said softly, running a hand gently down 
her face. "And I will tell you. But right now I need to 
go talk to everyone."

Scully nodded, even though she didn't understand the 
reasons for anything at the moment. 

Mulder leaned over and kissed her bruised forehead. 
"I'll be back in a few minutes."

"Hurry." She whispered, half asleep, as he rose from 
the bed. 
 

As Mulder walked down the halls of Nova he tried to 
ignore the whispers, the looks, and the pointing. 

Without a word he walked into the Main Room and 
stood by the fire. People gathered, waiting 
expectantly. Without making direct eye contact with 
anyone Mulder began to speak. "I know people have 
been talking about what happened. I'm asking you to 
forget all the rumors. What I'm gong to tell you is the 
truth, you'll have to trust my word that everything I 
am saying is true."

He paused, collecting his thoughts before telling the 
story of Scully's abduction, her cancer, the chip, and 
the callings. People listened intently, only responding 
with slight murmurs. ".She just woke before I came 
to speak with you. I'm sorry I couldn't explain this 
all sooner but I didn't want to leave her, she doesn't 
remember anything that happened. So I haven't 
explained it to her yet, I want her to rest. So I would 
appreciate it if everyone would let her do just that. I 
know you are all worried and I will tell her so, but I 
want her to take this slowly." 

Finally, for the first time since he began to speak he 
looked up at everyone. "I'm sure you have some 
questions about all this."

"Why didn't you tell us before?" Someone called 
bitterly.

Before Mulder could answer someone spoke up. 
"Before this happened I don't think there was any 
reason for them to tell us. That's Dana's business."

"But she has become a danger. She shot someone for 
God's sake!"

"She wasn't herself, like Mulder said. She didn't 
know what she was doing. You can't blame someone 
for their actions when they are not in control."

"That's like saying someone under the influence of a 
drug is not responsible for the people they may hurt 
or the things they may do."

"This is completely different! People who take drugs 
have that choice, this is not a choice."

"What about next time this happens?"

"That's right, what if she is operating on someone? 
What will happen to that person?"

"Where will that person be without Dana? Hopeless, 
no one else has her education."

"That's right, Nova needs her. And we need Mulder." 

In silence Mulder listened to the arguments. He 
didn't know what to do. His instinct told him to 
defend 
Scully and himself, but if he spoke too strongly he 
might lose the trust of everyone.

"Please." He interrupted politely, feeling it was the 
best time to stop the growing conflict. "We will work 
this out in time. Right now I would like everyone to 
go on with the rest of the day." He searched the air 
for a moment. "I'll speak with you all again soon." 
Hanging his head slightly, Mulder walked away, 
going straight into the Medical Room. 

"Long time no see." Skinner greeted from his bed, his 
arm resting against his chest in a sling. "How is she?"

Mulder shook his head nondescriptly. "She doesn't 
remember anything. I just wanted to see how you are 
doing before I go explain everything that happened."

"I'm perfectly fine. Amanda says I am healing well 
and I should be back to my old self against soon. 
Please tell her that."

Rubbing his eyes with his fingers he nodded. "I will. 
I'll talk to you soon."

"Good luck." Skinner called as Mulder stepped out of 
the door. 

Part 40
Day 236 (continued)
As Mulder opened the door slowly. Scully let her 
head loll in his direction. 

"I thought you would be sleeping." 

"I did for a little while." She said as Mulder sat 
beside her, tucking her blanket under her chin. "Is 
everything all right?"

He nodded dully. "I'm tired though."

With a little turn of her head she invited Mulder in 
next to her. Immediately he settled close with a sigh. 
Biting back a groan as he leaned on his sore body, 
Mulder lay on his side next to her, his hand resting on 
her belly unconsciously. Scully ran her fingers lightly 
over the back of his hand. "Mulder?"

"Hmm?" He hummed against her hair as he began to 
drift into sleep. 

"I need you to tell me what happened. I don't think I 
can sleep soundly until I know."

He let out a long breath into her hair. "Short version 
or long?"

"Just tell me everything."

"Everything." He repeated softly. "Ok.. Well, you 
woke up and got out of bed. I asked what was wrong 
and idiot me, it took a while to realize what was 
going on. I tried to keep you in the room, but the 
more I restrained you the harder you fought me. I was 
so afraid I would hurt you." Mulder's voice began to 
break on his words. "But I couldn't stop you. You 
were kicking and hitting. Things got out of hand and 
furniture was knocked over and broken."

"What did I break?" Scully interrupted, her voice a 
mix of concern and disbelief. 

Mulder hesitated for a moment. "The dresser a little, 
but the crib is ruined."

As if not believing what he said Scully's head 
quickly turned to look across the room. The corner 
was now empty other then a small pile of linens and 
the small mattress once in the crib, now leaning 
against the wall. "Oh my God." She whispered in 
shame. 

Mulder pressed his lips to her temple. "Don't worry, 
we'll get another one."

Scully nodded as she struggled to hold back tears. 
"What else happened?" She asked after a few 
moments of silence. 

"Umm.. After the dresser was knocked over things 
slowed down a little. We were both hurt pretty bad. 
You couldn't even stand for a few minutes." Mulder 
shuddered at the memory of her body crumpling to 
the ground repeatedly. "Somehow. somehow you 
got a hold of one of our guns." Scully twisted around 
to turn her face up to him. Her eyes wide with shock. 
"Everything from the drawers was on the ground and 
spread everywhere. It must have landed right by you. 
Skinner had heard all the commotion, people were 
gathering around outside when he came in. He helped 
me up so we could try to get control of you." Mulder 
shook his head slowly as he remembered. His mind 
had analyzed that night many times as he watched 
Scully sleep the last few days. "You must have felt 
threatened that we both were blocking the doorway. 
You pointed the gun at as." Mulder trailed off, not 
sure if he could get the rest of the words out. 

"Mulder. what happened?" Scully whispered. 

"Skinner was shot." 

Scully let out a petrified shock and tried to sit up, 
only to take a sharp breath and cringe to a stop.

"Easy." Mulder said gently helping her recline again. 
"He's all right. Amanda took care of him and he will 
be fine. I just went to see him."

"Where did I hit him?" 

"Shoulder. Went straight through. Must be your 
favorite spot to hit someone." His feeble attempt at a 
joke died in the air. 

Scully shut her eyes with a hand over her mouth. "I 
can't believe I did that."

"You didn't." Mulder said sharply, turning her face to 
look at his. "That wasn't you Scully. Trust me. I 
looked in your eyes and you weren't there." 

"That's the point Mulder. When this chip takes 
control I have no way to stop anything. What if I hurt 
you next time? What if I shoot you?" She paused 
with a look of horror. "My God, Mulder, what if I 
hurt the baby?" She paused again, running her hands 
over her stomach. "I haven't even felt it kick since I 
woke." Scully whispered. 

Mulder turned her face back to his. "I won't let you 
hurt the baby. I swear to you."

 "You couldn't stop me from hurting Skinner, and 
you couldn't stop me from hurting myself or you. I 
don't think anyone can. What will be different next 
time?"

"Maybe there won't be a next time." Mulder 
murmured hopefully. 

"That's right." Scully said firmly. "There won't be 
because I am taking the chip out." She forced herself 
in a sitting position, ignoring her body's protests of 
pain. "Right now." 

 Part 41
Day 236 (still continued)
Mulder reached out and grabbed Scully's arm. "What 
are you talking about?"

Scully looked at him soberly. "I'm taking it out 
Mulder, I have to."

"No." He said firmly. 

"Yes." She matched his tone when as betraying tears 
fell silently down her cheeks. 

"Scully you take the chip out and your cancer will 
come back." Mulder hissed at her. 

Scully's eyes wavered, focusing on the hollow of this 
throat to avoid his eyes. The thought of dealing with 
her cancer again terrified her. But the things that 
could, most likely would happen if she left the chip in 
were too horrifying to think about. 

"I've thought about it Mulder, while you were gone. 
And what you just told me. confirms the fact that I 
have to do this. I can't risk what could happen." 

His hands came up to frame her face, forcing her eyes 
on his. "Scully if you take the chip out-You. Will. 
Die." 

Nodding in his strong grasp she swallowed thickly. 
"I'll live long enough to deliver the baby." 

Her soft word sent a surge of nausea through his 
body, causing him to double over and break his hold 
on her. "No." He said in a soft whisper. "This isn't 
happening. You aren't saying this."

"Mulder listen to me." Scully placed her hand on the 
back of his neck, causing a shiver to run through him. 
How could he live without her touch? It was what 
kept him alive during their walk to Nova. 
She was his reason for being alive. Without Scully he 
would have had no desire to go on. He finally had 
her, really had her. As his wife. The thought was still 
almost unthinkable. It didn't seem real. But the fact 
that she was with him at the moment, in their room, 
in their bed, with her carrying his child made him 
remember. He refused to be a widower already. He 
would die with her. "Mulder, please." She whispered.

"What?" His broken voice answered. 

She was almost glad he wouldn't raise his head from 
the cradle of his hands to look at her. It would hurt 
more then it already did. Taking out the chip seemed 
just as terrifying as the moment she found it in there. 
She was signing her own death warrant. She didn't 
want to die. Not now. Not when she was finally with 
Mulder. With child. Her hand rubbed her belly, 
praying silently for the movement that she hadn't felt 
in hours. "It will be ok." She breathed out, although 
she didn't know what exactly would be ok. "Mulder, 
I will live for the rest the pregnancy. I can almost 
guarantee it." 

"Almost." He said with a bitter laugh. 

"Mulder, listen. This will work. I will take the chip 
out now, and I will be strong enough for at least a 
month to carry the baby." 

With each word from her mouth a part of Mulder's 
heart shut down within him.

"If things start to get bad we can induce labor with 
herbs and deliver the baby early. A month early will 
be ok. The baby will be ok." She added another silent 
prayer for her child with a rub of her stomach. How? 

`How could she be doing this to herself?' She found 
herself wondering.

She didn't even know. But she was. She was saying, 
out loud that it would ok if she would not live to see 
this child living inside her these past several months. 
To never look at the face of her baby and see whether 
it had Mulder's eyes and her mouth. To never tickle 
the little feet that have been kicking her tender 
womb. To never tell her child how much she loved it, 
tell how much a miracle its actual life is, to never be 
able to teach or love the child as it grew. To never see 
her grandchildren. She choked on a sob at the 
thought. Quickly she tried to swallow her fears and 
regrets to convince Mulder this was right. This had to 
be done. 
"You can't do this, Scully." Mulder finally looked up 
at her. Emotion was raw on his face. His eyes wide 
and red with tears. Fear. That was the message he 
sent to her. He was afraid. So was she. 

"I have to. Listen to me Mulder. Really listen to what 
I am saying." She paused to take a deep breath before 
signing her fate. "If the cancer takes the same course 
it did last time I will make through the rest of the 
pregnancy. I should even be able to nurse the baby as 
a newborn." Her voice broke clearly at the thought of 
not being able to do such an amazing, yet simple 
thing. She always felt, especially while in medical 
school, that nursing her child was her responsibility 
as a woman. Her God given right. 

"What if you can't?" Mulder hissed at her. "What if 
you die and can't nurse the baby?" He took her face 
back in his hands, locking her eyes on his with a 
deathly serious stare. "What if you die and the baby 
can't make it because you are here to nourish it?"

Sobs over took her body at the thought. "No." She 
said shaking her head firmly. "No, that won't happen. 
The baby will be fine without me."

"God damn it!" Mulder yelled pushing himself off the 
bed. 

The pain his body shot through him at the movement 
was easily ignored. The pain in his heart wasn't. It 
was unbearable. 

Standing at the side of the bed he pointed an 
accusatory finger at her. "Don't say that just so that 
you can feel right about what you are doing." He 
paused, staring at her icily. "Do you even realize 
what you are doing? You are killing yourself. You 
are." He dropped his knees in front of her, dropping 
his head to her lap where she sat on the edge of the 
bed. "You're killing me." He whispered through sobs, 
his arms coming to wrap around her body. He shook 
and trembled in her arms as he raised his head to kiss 
her stomach. "I am begging you Scully. Don't do 
this. Don't leave me." Resting his chin on her belly 
he looked up at her. "Don't do this to our baby."

Violently Scully pushed him off of her. "Don't YOU 
do this to me Mulder! I am doing this for you and for 
our child." Mulder looked up at her from his 
crouched position on the floor shaking his head 
slowly. 

"You are going to die!" He screamed at her. Getting 
up onto his knees he moved close to her, almost face 
level. In a soft whisper he spoke words that torn at 
his heart. "You will never here the words `I love you 
Mommy.'"

Scully gasp a shocked sob as the palm of her hand 
slapped Mulder's cheek, hard. "You bastard!" She 
slapped him again, Mulder made no move to stop 
her-the pain reminding him just for horribly true this 
moment was. Only when she balled her hand into a 
fist did he reached up and caught it in mid-strike. He 
stood, dropping her hand, and walked to the opposite 
side of the room and leaned his forehead against the 
cool stone. 

Rolling onto her side, Scully curled around herself 
and cried until she fell asleep, hours later. Mulder 
never moved. 

Day 237
Her eyes burned before she even opened them. 
Pressing the heels of her hands into the sockets she 
rubbed for a moment. As she rolled onto her back she 
opened her eyes. The room was dark, only the dim 
fire lighting the area close to the bed. Scully didn't 
even have to look over to know that Mulder was 
asleep with his head on the table, she just knew. An 
unstoppable sob grew in her throat. But she cast it 
aside as she slowly sat up, her body fighting her the 
whole time. Standing slowly, and a little unsteadily, 
Scully walked silently over to Mulder's side. A small 
smile spread across her face. He always looked to 
innocent when he slept. Bringing the back on her 
hand to her mouth she bit down to conceal the sobs 
that came out without her control. After a few deep 
breaths to regain herself she whispered softly to 
Mulder "I do love you. More then I can even say." 
Her hands settled on her tummy. "And I love our 
baby with everything I am. I know you do also." She 
kissed her first two fingers before running her hand 
through his hair. Mulder only stirred slightly, his 
sleep brought on by such exhaustion that he did not 
respond any more then that. "But I have to do this." 
Scully, as silently as possible, left the room. 

Part 42
Day 237(continued)
"May
all I do today
begin with you, O Lord.
Plant dreams and hopes
within my soul,
revive my tired spirit:
be with me today. 
May
all I do today
continue with your help, O Lord.
Be at my side
and walk with me:
Be my support today. 
May
all I do today
reach far and wide, O Lord.
My thoughts, my work, my life:
make them blessings
for your kingdom;
let them go beyond today,
O God." Scully whispered softly in the vacant 
Church. 

She tried calming her pounding heart with deep 
breaths but it hadn't helped. Scully was panicking. 
She had to do this. She had to take the chip out before 
she hurt someone seriously. She couldn't let that 
happen. The thought of harming Mulder again made 
her stomach twist. The concept that she could hurt 
her child made her almost physically ill, her mind 
couldn't even fathom the pain she would go through. 
She wouldn't be able to live with herself if either 
happened.

But what she was doing? This went against 
everything she was taught as a child. Everything 
Mulder had said to her back in their room she already 
knew. She knew she was killing herself by taking out 
the chip. She was risking the health of her child. But 
it seemed the only option with hope. 

Ever since Scully thought she was pregnant her mind 
toyed with the idea that somehow she was healed. 
Her pregnancy was a mystery to her. Maybe 
something had happened to the altar the chip when 
the aliens had colonized. The chip obviously still 
worked, it had more effect over her now then ever 
before. But for some reason she had been able to 
conceive a child. Maybe somehow her cancer was 
healed too. 

Scully laughed softly at herself. She felt so pathetic. 
Sitting in the Church, a scalpel in her hand ready to 
cut out the only thing that had been keeping her alive 
for years. Yet her mind was still desperately trying to 
convince her that she would live. 

At the moment her life almost seemed like a fairytale, 
at least the closest thing to a fairytale that she would 
ever have. She was married to Mulder, something she 
never even allowed herself to dream of. And she was 
pregnant. That alone made her head spin. Every time 
she had thought of Emily over the past few years the 
wound in her heart would open. That beautiful child 
that she was only allowed to have in her life for such 
a short time had effected her more then anything else. 
This seemed to be her second chance. A miracle. 
Scully ran her hand over her tummy. She hadn't felt 
this little miracle move inside her womb in so long. 
She continued to tell herself that she had just missed 
the movement. When she was asleep the baby must 
have shifted, but she was too tired to notice. 

Choking on a panicked sob she sent a silent prayer 
for her baby. 

She was terrified that something had already 
happened. That her uncontrollable violence had hurt 
her baby. The very chip that was supposably keeping 
her alive had killed her child. Or worse, that Mulder's 
struggle to keep her safe had done it. How would he 
live with himself? Scully knew he couldn't. He 
would let his guilt tear him apart until nothing was 
left. Scully wouldn't be able to watch that happen. 
She would rather take the blame. The guilt of what 
she was doing to herself was enough to break her 
heart, a little more wouldn't matter. 

Part of her still couldn't believe she was doing this. 
Killing herself. Might as well be suicide. She was 
deathly afraid that is what her God would see it as. 
This was something she was taught never to even 
think about. Life was too precious to do such a thing. 

But she was saving a life by doing this. The life of 
her child. Wasn't she? 

Scully pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes. 

Her mind was racing around itself so fast she could 
barely think straight. 

Shaking her head to focus, Scully held the scalpel up, 
the metal gleaming the candle lit room. Her heart 
pounded in her ears at the sight. 

She was putting this off. She needed to stop that, she 
needed to hurry. Scully knew that Mulder would 
wake soon when he sensed she wasn't in the room. It 
wouldn't take him very long to find her. And he 
would stop her. She knew that. Maybe part of her 
wanted him to came barging in here to save her from 
herself. But then a vicious cycle would start. She 
would just sneak off the next chance she worked up 
the courage to take out the chip. 

Scully nodded to herself. This needed to be done, and 
it needed to be done tonight. Before Mulder woke 
and found her, before he would make someone stay 
with her at all times to keep her from doing this. She 
knew he would do all these things. To save her and to 
save his child. 

Taking a deep breath, Scully reached a hand around 
to find her chip in her neck. It was barely noticeable. 
She doubted anyone other then herself and Mulder 
would even know it was there through touch. But it 
was there, just above the clasps of the two chains she 
wore around her neck. Grasping the oldest of the 
chains she followed it down the front of her neck, 
closing the small cross in her hand. "I'm sorry." She 
whispered to God. "I'm so sorry." Tears fell unbidden 
down her cheeks at the thought of her mother. How 
disappointed she would be. Maybe she would 
understand, Scully hoped, being a mother herself. 
She couldn't even get the words out as she thought of 
Mulder. How would he go on? She knew he would, 
for their child. But she knew that he would rather die 
along side her when the time came. Part of her 
wished he would too. Being without him, even in the 
after life, seemed unbearable. "I'm doing this for 
you." She whispered to her silent child. 

Scully wiped the tear streaks from her cheeks with 
her fingers before placing the small tweezers she 
would use to pull out the small chip on her thigh. 
With a deep breath she brought the scalpel up her 
flesh. 

Part 43
Day 237 (continued)

The sharp nudge in Scully's womb caused her to 
gasp. Another followed as the scalpel slipped and cut 
into her neck. The scalpel dropped with the ground 
with a clatter as her hands flew to her stomach, 
feeling the motions of her child inside and out. 

"Oh thank God." She whispered through tears of 
relief and joy. 

"Scully." She heard Mulder's frantic voice as he 
entered the room. 

All in the moment reality flooded her mind. 

"What's wrong?" Mulder tilted her gaze from the 
floor to him. Scully cried a little harder at the look in 
his eyes. So full of worry and love. 

Wordlessly Scully pulled his hands from her face and 
pressed them against her stomach. 

The relief that washed over him was visible. 
Mulder's eyes closed as Scully pulled his head to her 
chest, wrapping her arms around his shoulders and 
holding him to her. 

Scully could feel Mulder's tears seeping through her 
shirt and landing hot on her skin, yet he was silent. 
She wove her fingers into his hair and pressed her 
lips to his head, letting her tears fall into his hair. 
After a moment he smiled up at her, it quickly faded 
to pure fear. Scully watched in confusion as he 
reached a hand up to her neck. His fingertips 
skimmed over her skin, sliding slightly. Pulled his 
hand between them Scully saw her blood glistening. 
"You-?" 

"No." She said quickly. "I didn't- I was going to.. 
But the baby kicked. I only cut myself." 

His eyes closed in relief as he lowered his head down 
to nuzzle the space between her breasts and her 
swollen belly. "Thank God." He whispered brokenly. 

"I'm sorry." She whispered after a few long 
moments. 

Mulder slowly raised his wet eyes to her, unable to 
take his hands from the movement inside her body. 

"I'm so sorry." Scully repeated. "I. I don't know 
what I was thinking."

"You were just trying to do what you thought would 
be the best for our baby." Mulder defended her from 
herself. 

Scully looked away from him. "It would be better. 
But I don't think I can do it."

Mulder raised himself up on his knees more. "Then 
don't."

She looked at him with a sad smile. He sounded so 
hopeful. "I don't know if I can live like this." Her 
voice was a distant whisper. At his confused shake of 
his head she went on. "Never trusting myself. I don't 
know when I won't have control. What if one time I 
have a calling and you aren't there to stop me?" 
Scully didn't wait for him to answer, she was only 
thinking out loud. Mulder had no answers for her 
questions, she didn't expect him too. "What would 
happen if next time I go into labor?" Her eyes closed 
at the horrible thought of such a thing happening. 

"Hey." Mulder said softly to get her attention. Sliding 
one hand from her waist he cupped her jaw lightly. 
"You could ask what ifs until you are blue in the face, 
we both could. But that isn't going to help or answer 
any questions or make us feel any better about the 
callings." He broke their gaze for a moment to look 
off in thought. "I think- I know what would be best 
for you, and me and most importantly our child, is if 
you leave that chip in as long as you can." He 
returned his eyes to hers steadily. "But if the callings 
get worse, if they happened more often," his voice 
broke at just the thought of what he was saying, 
"Then the only thing to do would be to take out the 
chip." 

Scully nodded quickly then was distracted by a 
particularly hard kick and laughed softly as she 
guided his hand to the area under attack. 

Mulder rubbed his palm over the spot for a moment 
before looking up at her. "Let's go back to bed. 
We've both had a few long days."

Nodding in agreement she touched his cheek to bring 
his mouth up to hers for a languid kiss. Pulling away 
she rested his forehead against his. "Can you wait for 
me outside. I need to do something." 

He nodded before pressed his lips to hers again. Then 
down onto the top of her stomach. As he stood 
Mulder ran his hand down her arm, not wanting to 
break contact with her just yet. 

Scully waited until she heard the door click shut 
gently before she began to cry silently again. It felt 
wonderful to be crying for hope and joy, instead of 
guilt and fear. But she was still afraid, very afraid. 
Her mind, no matter how hard she tried, still raced 
with questions and worries. Part of which she knew 
was a normal part of pregnancy. But she was so 
afraid of herself, which was such unusual feeling. 
Never before did she have to fear herself. Never 
before was she unable to control her own mind. 

She shook her head forcefully. "Enough of that." She 
told herself out loud. Worrying will only make you 
age faster, as her grandmother always said. And 
Scully planned on living a long time. 

In the silence of the Church at this hour was easy to 
focus her mind on reality. On being logical. 

Scully ran a hand down her belly. "Let's go see 
Daddy, baby." She whispered as she stood and 
walked down the short aisle to the door. 

Mulder was leaning against the wall, he pushed 
himself to standing as Scully walked out. "Ready?"

Tucking her hair behind her ears Scully leaned into 
his side. "Yes."

With his hand on the small of Scully's back he 
walked her to their room. 

Part 44
Day 238
"He's not mad at you." Mulder breathed in Scully's 
ear as he leaned over, bracing a hand on either side of 
the doorframe, trapping Scully between the door to 
the Medical Room and himself. 

Scully hung her head slightly, leaning back against 
Mulder's chest. "But I'm mad at me."

His released breath stirred Scully's hair. "I know. 
And I know there is nothing I can say to make you 
feel better. I've tried." Mulder laughed softly, trying 
to keep the lingering stress of the situation at bay. 
"But I think you will feel better after you talk with 
him."

Rubbing her hands over her arms, Scully nodded. 
"You're probably right."

"Are you cold?"

"A little." She said with a shrug. 

Without another word Mulder unbuttoned his shirt 
and pulled it off, revealing another long sleeved shirt 
underneath. 

"Now you'll be cold." Scully argued weakly as he 
turned her around to face him and gestured for her to 
put the shirt on. 

Mulder pulled her arm through the sleeve as if he was 
dressing a toddler. "I'll be fine."

Scully just raised her eyebrows letting him finish 
buttoning the shirt. Just to procrastinate from talking 
to Skinner. "Look at this." Scully said with a frown as 
she poked at the way the shirt tented over her belly.
With a soft laugh Mulder leaned over and kissed 
Scully's cheek before reaching behind her to open the 
Medical Room door, forcing her in. Scully turned to 
see Amanda sitting on the edge of Skinner's bed, 
talking softly to him. They both looked over as 
Mulder clicked the door shut behind her. 

"Hi." She said weakly.

"Dana." Amanda said in surprise, raising from the 
bed to walk over and hug her gently. "How are you 
feeling?" She asked as she pulled away, trying to 
look discreetly at Scully's bruises. 

Scully turned her head away slightly, ashamed. "I'm 
better, thank you." 

"It's good to see you on your feet again, Scully." 
Skinner said with an honest smile.

"I've got some things to do." Amanda said quickly. 
"I'll see you both later." With a smile towards 
Skinner she left the room. 

Scully turned tensely towards Skinner. 

"Come sit down." He said, gesturing a hand to the 
chair beside his bed. 

She did as asked. Immediately bursting into tears. 
"I'm so sorry." She whispered around a hand over her 
mouth. 

"It's ok." Skinner said gently. Hesitantly he placed a 
hand on her arm, squeezing. "Amanda fixed me right 
up. Don't worry about it." He said lamely. 

"Don't worry about it?! I could have killed you." 
Scully couldn't bare to look at him so she plucked at 
the buttons of Mulder's shirt. 

"But you didn't" He ran his hand down her arm and 
pulled her fidgeting fingers into his. Moments passed 
where neither said a word until Skinner broke the 
thick silence. "I believe everything happens for a 
reason. Don't you?"

After a moment's thought Scully nodded. The more 
she thought about it, and the more that happened in 
her life, it only seemed logical. Life was too 
complicated, too many choices and options for one 
thing not to lead to another, for them all not to be 
connected in a certain way. Fate maybe. 

"Well I was shot and that lead to Amanda and I. 
Amanda and I being together again. It set that right." 

Scully looked up at him uncertainly. After a moment 
she looked down to their embraced hands. "It doesn't 
make me feel any better." 

Skinner chuckled. "Honestly I'm not surprised. If I 
was in your situation I. I actually have no idea what 
I would be thinking."

For some reason that made Scully feel better. 
Looking up she held his eyes for the first time with a 
smile.
 

Somehow people were able to sense that Mulder was 
there to talk. Without uttering one word he stood in 
the Main Room and people joined him. Gathering 
around they all spoke at once in a soft concerned 
tones. 
"Is Dana all right?" "We haven't seen her in days, is 
everything ok?" 

Mulder smiled appreciatively at them. It still amazed 
him that this many people, all strangers only a few 
months ago, cared so much. These simple charms 
that adorned each and every neck in this complex 
system of catacombs immediately made a person an 
ally. Every week new people would arrive, weak, thin 
and freezing from their journey. They would be 
brought into the warm walls of Nova, given a room, 
small and drab but compared to the snowy ailments 
they come from very inviting. Supplied with more 
food then they had seen in months. With fresh milk, 
and meat when available. The comforts of a constant 
fire, a soft bed, and new clothes. And most 
importantly instant friends. Of course the initial 
judgements were passed, it was basic human nature. 
This person came from a pampered life, that person 
isn't a Christian, that person isn't Jewish, this one has 
such a large family-they will expect more then their 
fair share. But words were always kind, rumors 
where rumors. And they never lasted long. Walking 
the halls late in the evening Mulder would catch bits 
and pieces of conversations with the newcomers. All 
of which were intellectual and friendly. 

Mulder had never experienced something like this. 
People consistently being good natured. He had to 
wonder if it was the surroundings or the situation. 
But it didn't really matter, as long as it stayed like 
this. He believed that as long as people were arriving 
and there was work to be done and good people to do 
it, nothing would change. 

"She is going to be ok." Mulder said with an 
involuntary smile. 

Relieved murmurs and bright smiles were his replies. 

Mulder cleared his throat after a moment. "I'm sure 
you are all wondering where we stand on the chip 
subject, so I will tell you. Scully is leaving it in." 
Ignoring the mumbling Mulder continued. "After a 
long discussion Scully and I both feel it is for the best 
at the moment. There is too much at stake if she was 
to remove the chip at this time. Besides, she was able 
to warn Nova once about an attack, I think this is a 
precious gift that we need to hang on to as long as 
everything stays under control." Mulder paused and 
looked out at everyone. "I'm very sorry if anyone has 
a problem with how we are dealing with this. I ask 
you to put yourself in our position. As far as we 
know this is the only thing keeping Scully alive at the 
moment. The only thing enabling her to keep this 
baby alive." Immediately the scattered grim faces 
softened. "It may be our only hope for knowing what 
the aliens are planning. In my opinion I don't think 
there is much room for debate." Mulder's hopes were 
too weak, too unsteady, to stand and wait for 
someone to argue them. Quickly he nodded to the 
crown, bowed his head slightly and walked away 
leaving the rumors to begin as he knew they would. 

Day 240
Mulder glanced over at Scully from his seat at the 
table. She lay, like she had for the past hour, staring 
into the fire. Rising slowly, Mulder walked over and 
sat by her, rubbing his hand up and down the side of 
her thigh. 

Scully looked away from to fire to his eyes with a 
soft smile. 

"What you thinking about?" 

She blushed a little and ran a hand over her stomach.

With a knowing smile Mulder moved to lay down 
behind her, covering her roaming hand with his own. 
Scully rolled over with a grin. "So are you ready?"

He gave her a confused look. 

"To deliver the baby?" 

With a groan he lowered his head to bury it between 
her breasts. "Why do you like teasing me with this? 
You do realize I'm scared to death, don't you?"

She kissed the top of his head. "I'm sharing my fear."

Mulder quickly looked up at her. "If you would 
rather-"

"No." She said quickly. "I'm just scared of the actual 
labor process, pain has never been my strong suit." 
She touched his cheek tenderly. "But having you 
there will make it much better."

"I would be there even if I wasn't going to deliver the 
baby, Scully, you know that." 

She nodded and ruffled his hair playfully. "I know. 
But for some reason having you being the only other 
person with me helps."

Mulder pulled back slightly. "You don't want anyone 
else in the room? What if I need help? Scully.." He 
said uneasily. 

"It will be ok." She said gently with a shrug. "I just 
don't want anyone else there. Don't ask me to 
explain it because I can't." She laughed softly at 
herself. "I'll blame it on hormones." 

Frowning, Mulder set his head on the pillow next to 
Scully, staring at her uncertainly. 

She pouted slightly. "Please, just trust me on this. It 
feels right."

"I don't understand you one bit." He said in a tone 
that made Scully know he had agreed with her.

With a brilliant smile she leaned forward and kissed 
his nose. 

"You know I can't say no you to." He grumbled with 
a smile. 

Scully hummed happily and settled herself close to 
Mulder, with her head under his chin. "Good night, 
Mulder." She said sweetly. The moment the words 
were out of her mouth a loud knock sounded at the 
door. 
"Ignore it." She quickly told Mulder, wrapping an 
arm around his waist and borrowing her face in his 
neck. 

"You know I can't do that." He groaned shifting his 
way out of bed. Mulder swung the door open the be 
greeted by Langly, Frohike, and Byers all grinning 
madly. "What the-?"

"Coming through." Langly announced at they pushed 
their way into the room. 

Scully sat up on the bed with a look of shock. "Where 
in the world did you get that?" She asked as they 
lugged a freshly painted wooden crib into the far 
corner. 

"We made it." Byers proclaimed. 

Mulder's jaw dropped open. "You're kidding?"

"Oh my God. Thank you." Scully said hugging 
each man in turn, trying to hold back the grateful 
tears. 
"Consider it our baby present to the both of you." 
Langly said patting the railing proudly. 

"How did you build that so fast?" Mulder asked 
suspiciously. 

Frohike frowned at his disbelieving tone. "We work 
well together." 

Byers tactfully grabbed the other men by their elbows 
and dragged them to the door. "We can tell you two 
were just getting off to bed. We just wanted to bring 
it over as soon as we finished it."

"Bye!" Mulder and Scully heard called as the door 
was shut. 

For a moment they just stood, staring that the new 
piece of furniture. 

Scully walked up and ran her hand over the semi 
rough wood. "I hate to ask. but is it safe?" She 
laughed softly.

Mulder bit his lip and shrugged. Leaning down he 
picked up the small mattress and placed it in the crib. 
"It's a tight fit." He muttered trying to press the 
mattress down. Scully walked up next to him and 
helped push. 

There was a slight crack, then a clatter as the far side 
of the crib near the wall fell off and landed on the 
ground. 

Scully slapped a hand over her mouth trying to hold 
in the laughter. 

"Whoops." Mulder said as he took Scully by the 
shoulders and lead her back to bed. "I think that is a 
bad omen." Laughing he tucked the blankets around 
Scully. "We'll fix it in the morning." Turning off the 
lamps he crawled back in bed next to a still giggling 
Scully.

"We won't tell them that happened. The poor guy's 
hearts will be broken." With one last laugh she rested 
her head on Mulder's shoulder. "That was sweet of 
them though."

Nodding in agreement Mulder turned his head and 
kissed her forehead with a fond smile. "Night, 
Scully."
 
Part 45
 Day 243
"Scully.. What are you doing?"

She stood back from the dresser, hands on her hips, 
with a frown. "I don't like how this is set up." 

Mulder rolled his eyes as he read on the bed. "You've 
reorganized that drawer three times tonight."

"I know." She mumbled, glaring at the drawer in 
question. 

Tossing his book to the side, Mulder crawled on all 
fours to the end of the bed. He reached out and 
grabbed Scully's hand, tugging her towards the bed. 
"Come on. It's getting late."

She gently slipped her hand from his, really not 
listening to what he was saying. "I just want to fix 
this."

With an over exaggerated groan Mulder threw 
himself back onto the bed. "You're impossible."

Scully looked over her shoulder for a split moment. 
"Huh?"

"Scully." He said loudly with a smile. "Come to bed. 
Please."

"Sorry." She said sheepishly. "It was just. bothering 
me for some reason." Scully muttered as she pulled 
the blankets up from the foot of the bed and laid 
back. 

Mulder laughed under his breath as he settled in next 
to her, his hand rubbing her round belly. "I think you 
are nesting."

Scully glared at him. "I loathed that term." 

"Why?" Mulder asked with a disbelieving laugh. 

"I don't need to feather my nest." She muttered with 
distaste. "I'm just. straightening. and 
organizing."

"Scully." She looked up at him. "Quit while you are 
ahead." 

"Shut up, Mulder." Scully muttered.

His response was a yawn. 

Scully smiled as wiggled into the sheets. "About time 
you started listening to me." 

"I worked hard today." Mulder defended himself 
halfheartedly as he nuzzled his face into the crook of 
Scully's neck. 

She ran her hand over the arm that was slung lazily 
over her body with a frown. "I don't like the idea of 
you working outside in the snow all day, Mulder. 
You're going to come down with something."

"We've got to finish the new barns for next year so 
we can work on the fields as soon as the weather 
changes. Otherwise we will be trying to do too many 
things at once and we won't have the crops we 
should be able to or homes for the animals that are 
born in spring." Mulder rationalized in a monotone 
voice, this wasn't the first time he had to tell Scully 
the reason for doing what he was. 

"Isn't there something you can do inside?" 

Mulder pulled his face away from her body, hoisting 
himself up with an arm on either side of her head. 
"Everyone who can't work outside is working 
inside." He kissed her quickly, then moved down and 
settled his head on her breasts and his hand on her 
stomach. "Enough talk. More sleep."

Scully sifted her head through his hair, watching the 
firelight bounce off. "Why don't you just say `shut 
up, Scully?'"

"Shut up, Scully." 

She slapped his head lightly. 

"Hey." He muttered. "You told me to."

Scully ran her nails lightly over the back of his neck, 
causing him to shiver. "Well since you seem to be 
doing what I tell you to tonight, tell your child to stop 
kicking me so I can sleep."

Mulder's hand roamed her belly until he found the 
motions. "Stop kicking your Mom, baby, she needs 
her rest." His voice was just a whisper, barely audible 
to Scully. 

"Thank you." Scully whispered with a smile, laying 
her hand against his cheek. "Good night."

"Night, Scully." His next words were so soft, Scully 
wasn't sure if she actually heard them or if it was her 
imagination. "Good night, little one. Hope to see you 
soon."

Day 245
Skinner leaned back in his chair, resting his good arm 
over his bad. "You're full of shit." He accused 
Amanda with a grin. 

"I am not." She said through a laugh. 

"Then why are you laughing?"

Amanda chose to ignore that question. "I'm serious. I 
saw it with my own eyes."

Skinner rubbed the back of his neck looking at her 
suspiciously. "Langly. building a chair..." He 
repeated is amazement. 

"Not just one chair, the last of four." 

He shook his head slowly. "I was wondering what 
those guys would do without their computers." 

Laughing, Amanda shifted in her chair, watching 
Skinner intently. After a moment she broke eye 
contact, fiddling with an imaginary piece of lint of 
her pant leg. "I've missed this. Just talking, just being 
here. with you." 

Skinner nodded. "Yeah, I did too."

"I'm sorry." Amanda said quickly with a sudden 
burst of bravery. "I pushed you away when I really 
wanted you with me. I was alone, I was scared-"

"Stop." Skinner interrupted softly as he slid his chair 
closer to her. "I understand why you did what you 
did. Hey." He reached his hand out to tilt her face up 
to his. "Look at me. I understand. I wish you hadn't. 
We both need each other, Mandy. And we are 
together now. So let's not dwell on the past. You are 
sorry and I accept that. I am sorry for the way I tried 
to push you into talking with me. I should have let 
you be. But I was scared." His voice dropped low. "I 
didn't-I don't want to lose what we have. I've never 
had anything like this and I have a feeling its just 
going to get better from here."

He was interrupted by the Medical Room door 
opening and Mulder walking in. He immediately 
looked embarrassed for walking in on their obviously 
private conversation. "Scully's not here." He noted. 
Amanda shook her head with a friendly smile. "She 
kept yawning so we forced her to go lay down for a 
little while."

Mulder smiled appreciatively. "I can always use a 
few more people on my side." He trailed off, 
looking back and forth between the two. "I'll leave 
you guys alone, thanks." Shutting the door Mulder 
muttered an "Whoops" under his breath as he started 
down the hallway towards his room. 

"Hey, Mulder!" 

He turned at the sound of his name, looking for who 
it came from. Seeing Bobby walking towards him he 
met him half way. "Hey, Bobby."

"Do you have a minute." The older man asked. 

Mulder nodded and gestured for him to walk over to 
the side of the hallway. "What's on your mind?"
Bobby let out a long breath, looking down the 
hallway to see if anyone was listening. "I saw a few 
ships today."

"That's not unusual." Mulder said with a nod. "I see 
at least one or two fly overhead every day."

"I know. but this was different."

Mulder involuntarily leaned forward, waiting the rest 
of the story. "Go on." He said after a moment of 
tensing silence.

"They were moving very slow." Bobby said 
uncomfortably. "They usually move fairly fast. But it 
was like they lingered over Nova. They flew in like 
usual, then. hesitated for a few minutes before 
moving on." 
Mulder rubbed his jaw. "I see." 

"Listen." Bobby said quickly. "I know it might be 
nothing, but it just didn't sit right with me." 

After another moment of silence Mulder slapped 
Bobby's shoulder lightly. "Thanks for telling me. Let 
me know if anything else odd happens."

"I will." The older man said with a nod. "I'll see you 
around."

". Yeah." Mulder said distracted. A minute or two 
later he shook himself from his thoughts and made 
his way down the rest of the hallway, opening the 
door to his room slowly, in case Scully was sleeping. 
He saw her, curled slightly on her side, with a 
peaceful expression. Moving silently he sat at her 
hip, pushing hair from her face.

Scully woke slightly from her light sleep. "Hi." She 
whispered. 

"Hey. How are you feeling?"

She smiled. "Good. I'm just resting for a bit."

Mulder nodded, relieved. 

Rolling onto her back slightly she looked up at him. 
"Is everything ok?" 

Trying to give a convincing smile he rubbed her 
belly. "Of course it is."

Day 248
"Don't start that again." Mulder called from his 
reclined position on the bed as he watched Scully 
walk up to the dresser and open the top drawer. 

She looked up with a sheepish laugh. "I won't."

"You're awfully antsy tonight.. You ok?" 

"Yeah." She said quickly. "I think I am just starting 
to go stir crazy."

Mulder nodded in understanding. The past two days 
it had snowed heavily, trapping everyone inside 
unless they wanted to start shivering after a few 
moments in the cold. 

Scully stretched her arms over her head with a groan. 

"You ok?" 

"You already asked that and I said yes, I'm am." 
Scully smiled over at him, finding his over 
protectiveness amusing at the moment. 

Mulder frowned. "Sorry."

"It's ok." She said lightly, fiddling with the stacks of 
dishes on the cabinet. "Oh!" She said in surprise, 
pressing a hand to her stomach as she let out a long 
breath. 

"Scully?" Mulder was on his feet and to her side in a 
moment. 

She waved him off as he tried to help her sit. Her 
eyes were closed tightly as she let out long slow 
breaths. 

"Scully, what's wrong?" He asked once she opened 
her eyes and stood up right again. 

"I. I think I just had a contraction." 

Mulder took a surprised step back. "But-"

"False labor." She said quickly. "It happens towards 
the end of pregnancy. and we really don't know 
how far along I am so it makes sense."

"Will you please lay down?" He gently took her 
elbow and guided her towards the bed. 

She sat stiffly on the edge. "I don't want to lay down. 
I'll sit though." She looked up at his troubled face. 
"It's ok, Mulder." Scully smiled up at him, taking his 
hand gently in hers. "Don't worry. I feel perfectly 
ok."

He nodded before letting his hand slip from hers and 
began to pace the room. 

Scully rolled her eyes thinking that the only thing 
Mulder needed was a cigar and he would look like 
the typical father in the waiting room. If it was labor 
that is. "Oh God!" Scully said in disbelief.

"What?" Mulder asked quickly turning around to 
look at her. 

She stared up at him with wide eyes. "My water just 
broke." 
 
Part 46
Day 248 (continued)
Mulder blinked at her for a moment. "Are you sure?"

Scully gave a short nervous laugh. "Yes. Mulder, I'm 
sure." She gestured to her now wet pants. 

The moment the panic set in was visible on Mulder's 
face. "Lay down." He ordered, walking over and 
moving her feet up on the bed. His mind quickly 
going through the many pages of labor instruction he 
had read. 

"Mulder, relax." She said, trying to do just that 
herself. "I've had one contraction-" 

"The labor process speeds up the moment water 
breaks." He recited, as he gently pulled off her pants. 
Keeping his voice calm and even was by far one of 
the hardest things he had ever had to do. Scully was 
in labor. Actual labor. His mind was still struggling 
to catch up with its surroundings. 

Scully took a deep breath, trying to ease the 
nervousness in her stomach as she shifted to rest 
herself comfortably on the bed. She watched for a 
moment as Mulder moved to get her a clean pair of 
pants. "What you doing?"

He glanced over his shoulder quickly. "You just need 
to put them on for a minute while I get you to the 
Medical Room." For months he had the plan of how 
this event would go worked out in his head. Part of 
him believed that if it went how he had pictured, 
nothing could possible go wrong. 

"We can't go there." Scully said quickly. "Skinner is 
still there." 

Mulder paused as he kneeled down to help her into 
the pants. "He can go back to him room, Amanda can 
take care of him in there."

"No." Mulder looked up at her, shocked to see she 
looked like a frightened animal. "I want to stay here." 

Scully crossed her arms protectively over her belly. 
The thought of walking into that room, anywhere, 
and meeting up with someone made her heart pound 
even harder in her chest. Not many people had seen 
Scully when she was scared, truly scared. Mulder 
was the only person out of those few that was still 
alive that she knew of. Scully had no plans to add to 
that list. 

"Scully-"

"No. I want to stay in the room, Mulder. I don't want 
to leave. I'm staying." 

He didn't know how to respond to her defensive and 
determined tone. "Ok." Mulder said slowly, looking 
around the room. Cautiously he brought his gaze 
back to her. "Are you sure I can't take you to the 
Medical Room?" Mulder immediately held up his 
hand to ward off her protests after the angry look she 
shot him. "I have to go get a few things then." 
Suddenly his plans were turned upside down, but he 
was determined to shift through the rubble and get 
through this. 

Nervously Scully ran her hands over her belly. "Ok." 
Her throat went painfully dry at the thought of 
spending even a minute alone. 

Mulder moved to her upper body and began to pull 
off her shirt. "Let's get you a little more comfortable, 
ok?"

She nodded and raised her arms she he pulled the 
first layer of her shirts over her head. She lowered her 
arms with a sharp gasp, immediately turning it into 
deep practiced breaths. It shocked her how quickly 
her instinct took over and made her breathe evenly, 
even though she wanted to double over in pain. But 
just after the first cleansing breath her body relaxed 
some, the pain leaving with the air. 

Gently, as to not distract Scully too much, Mulder 
pushed her hair away from her face as it started to 
stick to the thin sheen of sweat. "That's it." He said 
gently as she breathed through her second 
contraction. 
Scully let out one last long breath. "These are coming 
fast." She said weakly. Suddenly she wished the 
wives tale of a woman's first labor taking hours upon 
hours was true. Scully didn't feel ready for this. Her 
body: yes, her mind: no.

Mulder just nodded as he pulled off the rest of her 
clothing quickly. "Here, lets put this on." He pulled a 
large short sleeved shirt over her head. "Are you 
warm enough?"

Scully nodded quickly. 

Giving her a reassuring smile, Mulder picked up her 
hands and kissed them lightly. "I'm going to go, I'll 
be right back. Ok?" A little part of him wished she 
would say no, that he couldn't leave her. Even for a 
minute. Because he didn't want to. Mulder wanted to 
climb into bed with her, wrap his arms around her 
body and take away some of her pain. 

She nodded and tugged his hands close to her. 
Mulder met her half way and gave her a gentle kiss. 
"Hurry, please." Scully whispered. 

Mulder quickly stood. "Trust me, I will." Without 
another look, for fear he wouldn't be able to tear 
himself away from her, he left the room. It was all he 
could do not to run down the hallway, but there was 
nothing he could do to stop his jog. Throwing open 
the door to Medical Room he stumbled upon Skinner 
and Amanda talking quietly. 

"You ok, Mulder?" Skinner asked as he looked 
Mulder up and down. His face was flushed, from his 
run to the room and an intense mixture of 
nervousness and excitement. 

"Scully's in labor." He said in a breath.

Amanda jumped up from the bed. "Do you need 
help?" The truth was she had no idea what to do, she 
had barely read anything about childbirth. But she 
was willing to try. 

Mulder was busy gathering together the items he had 
organized for this moment last month. "No, thanks."

"Wait a second." Skinner said, sitting upright more 
on the bed. "Who's delivering the baby then?" He 
had been so wrapped up in his life with Amanda, or 
lack there of, for the past few months he missed 
details like this. 

Straightening up, bounty in hand, Mulder smiled 
nervously. "You're looking at him."

Amanda let out a surprised laugh. She figured she 
would have better luck then Mulder. Then again, the 
man never ceased to amaze her. 

"Listen." Mulder said lightly making his way towards 
the door. "I would love to stand here and talk about 
how unqualified and scared to death I am about doing 
this. And how much I wish I could hand this 
responsibility over to someone else so I can start 
pacing and wait for the baby to be born. But the 
pregnant lady said I'm doing it, so I'm doing it." 

"If you need any help come and get me." Amanda 
said as she opened the door for Mulder so he 
wouldn't have to jungle his armload. 

Mulder nodded gratefully. "I will, Thanks." Though 
he prayed he would have no need to. 

"Good luck." Skinner called as Mulder hurried down 
the hallway, stopping only to add a bucket of water to 
his already heavy load. 

Somehow he managed to open the door to his room 
without dropping anything. "Everything alright?" He 
asked Scully the moment he stepped inside. 

Scully nodded, looking worried. The few minutes she 
was alone ticked by like years. 

Depositing his items on the table he sat beside her 
with a damp cloth in his hands. "Lean back a little." 
Mulder whispered, placing the cloth over her 
forehead as she did. "Did you have another 
contraction while I was gone?" 

"No." She said softly. Her heart pounded in her ears 
so loudly she could barely hear herself speak. Before 
she went into labor and thought about the whole 
process she was frightened. She knew it would be 
painful, hopefully not too long, and probably the 
most emotional experience of her life. The moment 
she went to into labor she could think of nothing else 
other then the fact that after some very severe pain 
she was going to be responsible for a new life. The 
care, the nurturing, the education, the love, the list 
went on and on. 
Mulder smiled brightly at her, stroking her flushed 
cheek the back on his fingers. "Relax."

"This is coming from the man who began to fidget 
nervously every time you thought of this moment. 
What's with the sudden air of nonchalant?"

He shook his head clueless. "Adrenaline maybe. Or 
the fact that it is actually happening so I better just 
deal with it." 

Scully opened her mouth to say something but 
quickly closed it as a strong contraction went through 
her body. Shutting her eyes tightly she squeezed 
Mulder's hand to the point of pain. 

But he did not utter a word as she breathed through 
her own, more pressing pain. He watched as the 
tension melted from her body in one last breath. 
"Ok?" 

She nodded, a tear slipping from the corner of her 
closed eye. 

Mulder leaned forward to kiss it away. "You are 
doing great." She nodded, finally opening her eyes. 
"You can do this." He said softly. "We both can."

"Yes, we can." She agreed with a smile. They had no 
choice, it came down to that.

"Ok." Mulder said looking around. "Let's get you set 
up, this is happening a little faster then either of 
anticipated and I won't want to be rushed later on." 

"Where do you want me?" Scully asked, letting him 
take control of the situation, her mind wasn't nearly 
as together at his seemed to be.

"Slide closer to the foot of the bed, so that I can kneel 
at the bottom. Here, I'll help you." Gently he helped 
her wiggle down a few feet, pilling pillows up for her 
to lean back on. "Do you want to sit up?"

Scully was quiet for a moment. She hadn't thought 
about these slight details beforehand, which surprised 
her. She had felt fairly prepared, now she was 
flustered and nervous. "I think so."

Mulder nodded and set more pillows up for her. 
"Lean back and tell me if that is ok."

"Perfect." She said softly. 

With a nod he slowly moved down to her feet, trying 
not breaking physical contact with her if not 
necessary. Mulder moved everything to the foot of 
the bed, so that he wouldn't have to move far away 
from Scully and the baby. "How do you want your 
legs?"

"I don't know." Scully said suddenly feeling tired. 
Mulder had everything under control, she saw that 
and her body responded how it wanted it, with 
lethargy. Maybe it was human nature, suddenly 
slowing down to store energy for the actual birth, or 
maybe her adrenaline wore off. 

Mulder ran his hands up and down her calves after he 
bent them so her feet were flat on the mattress. "This 
ok?"

She nodded dully. 

With one last look around, Mulder felt everything 
was ready, he just had to wait on the baby now. He 
was becoming anxious, while Scully was the 
complete opposite. He moved from the foot of the 
bed and sat slightly behind Scully, running his hands 
over her shoulders and arms. "Comfortable?"

"I think as much as I can be, yes." Scully leaned her 
head back onto his shoulder. "I'm feeling tired."

Mulder kissed her temple lightly. "Go ahead and rest. 
Just let me know when you feel like you want to push 
as the contractions get closer."

"I know." She said with a smile. "I am the doctor 
after all." 

"Not tonight you aren't. Dr. Mulder is here to take 
care of you." He said with a snicker. 

Scully made a small whimpering noise as another 
contraction started. Mulder quickly moved to take her 
hand, letting her breath through it. Instinctively he 
wanted to help her breath, to coach her through it. 
But they had decided beforehand that he wouldn't do 
that. Not when he would have to be focusing on the 
baby. 
"They are getting stronger." She said breathlessly 
after a few moments rest.

"That's good." Mulder hugged her gently from 
behind. "Fast labor means less pain I would assume." 

Scully nodded enthusiastically. "Less pain in a very 
good thing." She sucked in another quick breath.

"Another one?" Mulder asked in shock. 

She nodded as she released a long breath. 

Reluctantly Mulder slid away from her and down to 
the foot of the bed, making a quick stop to retrieve 
one of the pans of hot water he had on the stove. 
Washing his hands quickly but thoroughly he gently 
lifted the sheet tenting Scully's lower body, just as 
she relaxed back into the pillows. 

"I'm not ready to push yet." She informed Mulder in 
a slightly panicked tone.

"Ok." He said gently. "Don't try to rush anything, 
Sweetheart." Mulder expected to feel a little odd 
examining Scully in the way he was, but he didn't. It 
felt completely natural for him to be checking the 
progress of the birth of his child. "Everything looks 
text book so far." He said in relief, covering her 
again. 
With a tired hand Scully wiped sweat from her brow. 

"Here, let me get that." Mulder said moving to 
dampen the cloth. Placing it gently on her forehead 
he tucked her damp hair behind her ears. "You're 
doing great." He whispered honestly in her ear. The 
pain was obvious, but Scully had kept her usual brave 
face. 

"This is happening too fast." She whispered. 

"That's good." Mulder reassured, tenderly rubbing 
her belly. "I'm going to miss this." He said with a 
soft laugh. He loved her pregnant body. So full and 
healthy. She was so alive. His thoughts were 
interrupted by another contraction hitting Scully. He 
waited it out with her. Wiping away the damp 
streams on her cheeks and kissing her face lightly. "I 
think it's time you start to push. Maybe another 
contraction or two, but these are coming fast and 
strong."

"Oh God." Scully whispered, panic settling deep in 
her chest. 

Mulder moved down the bed once again. "It's going 
to be ok, Scully. Do you think you are ready to 
push?"
With a clenched jaw she nodded, feeling another 
contraction coming around the corner. 

"This one?"

Scully quickly shook her head. She wasn't ready. She 
needed another moment to collect her mind. This was 
actually happening. She was about to give birth to her 
child. 

Mulder squeezed her knee as she breathed through 
the pain with one hand, and lifted away the sheet with 
the other. "The baby is crowning." He said with a 
twist of nervousness in his stomach. 

Scully nodded. "I'm ready."

"All right." An intense wave of adrenaline passed 
over Mulder. With a long released breath from 
Scully, Mulder watched as her face twisted with 
concentration and pain. "You're going great, Scully." 
He said softly as he guided the baby's head out her 
body. "Keep pushing, Sweetheart." 

She stopped as the contraction ended, panting and 
struggling to wipe the sweat from her eyes with a 
tired hand. "Are the shoulders out?" Scully asked 
breathlessly. 

"Just about." 

"Everything ok?" Scully barely got the words out 
before she had to push again. 

"Perfect, Scully. Just keep pushing." He answered, 
half his attention on her and half on the new life he 
held partly in his hands. 

Scully collapsed back into the pillows. "Mulder." 
Said softly, not in question, just as a statement. 
Mulder pressed his lips to the inside of Scully's knee. 
"You're going great. One more push, ok?"
Her nod quickly segued into her last push. 

In a moment the silent room filled with the cries of 
their baby. With a sob, of relief and joy, Scully fell 
back against the pillows. "Mulder?" Her exhausted 
voice called. 

"She's beautiful, Scully." He said is awe as he 
quickly cut the umbilical cord and cleaned the crying 
baby slightly. Never before had Mulder held 
something so precious, so amazing in his hands. He 
was looking at a true miracle.

"She?" Scully said, forcing her limbs to cooperate 
enough to sit up. 

Cradling the wet baby against his chest, Mulder made 
his way over to Scully. At the moment he finally 
understood why Scully wanted him to deliver their 
baby. Knowing that he was the first person to touch 
their child, and that Scully would be the second. it 
just seemed right. It was how nature intended. 
Mulder eased the child, still wet from birth, onto 
Scully's chest. "She is beautiful." Scully whispered 
as the baby quieted slightly due to Scully's 
comforting stroking. She ran her hands over her 
whole, small body. Counting fingers and toes, tracing 
her plump cheeks, tiny hands, and rosebud mouth. 

Mulder watched Scully hold the baby for a moment, 
his arms wrapped around her and his forehead against 
the side of her head. "I need to clean her up so she 
doesn't get cold." He said after a few more moments.
"Ok." Scully said softly, reluctantly letting Mulder 
lift the child from her arms. She turned onto her side 
to watch him carefully carry the baby to the table to 
set her down a pile of blankets, gently washing her 
tender skin. Once cleaned he dressed her quickly in a 
cloth diaper and a simple cotton one piece to ward off 
chills. 
"Mulder, I want to hold her." Scully called as he 
moved to set her in the crib. 

"So do I." He said with a smile as he made his way 
back over to the bed. "But I need to clean you up 
too."
As he gently washed her, Scully looked longingly 
over to the other side of the room. 

"Arms up." Mulder said, breaking her out of her daze. 
He quickly pulled a clean shirt over her head and 
helped move her to the top of the bed. "I'll go get 
her." He pressed a long kiss to her forehead and 
moved to get the baby just as she began to cry. "Shh." 
He cooed softly as he wrapped a blanket around the 
small bundle and sat beside Scully. 

Scully held out her arms expectantly. 

"What should we name her?" She asked after a few 
moments of silence. 

Mulder lifted his head slightly from where he was 
leaning back against the wall, Scully's head resting 
on his shoulder. He ran his hand up and down the 
baby's leg. "Any ideas?"

Scully's eyes slowly began to close without her 
control as she leaned into Mulder's warmth. "You 
wanted a girl so you must have something thought 
up." She smiled up knowingly. "Please share."

Mulder blushed a little. "I've always loved the name 
Aeryn."

Looking down at the baby, Scully smiled. "That is 
beautiful, Mulder. And it fits her for some reason. 
Aeryn it is."

Mulder felt a surge of pride at being able to name 
their daughter. "You pick a middle name." 

Scully bit her lip. "I think." She said slowly. "It 
would be fitting if we named her Hope."

Pressing his lips to Scully's temple he let out a 
whispered. "Yes." Pulling way he looked down at the 
baby in Scully's arms, Aeryn's fingers had wrapped 
around his index finger without his even knowing it. 
"That is prefect." 

"Aeryn Hope." Scully whispered softly. "Welcome to 
the world." 

Part 47

Day 249
Scully woke slowly, her body drained and sore. But 
her heart was light and eager for her to open her eyes. 
Her mind however, was content to rest longer so her 
eyes didn't open. Instead she leaned back into 
Mulder's warmth as he held her behind. His face 
rested against her neck, his breath moist and warm 
just below the base of her skull. Under the pillow 
they shared Scully could feel Mulder's arm folded, 
lifting her head even more. His other arm, purely out 
of habit rested over her body, his hand over her now 
vacant womb. 

With a deep sigh Scully finally opened her eyes. 
Immediately she focused across the dim room to the 
crib. She could see slight movements through the 
bars and smiled. Scully watched her baby from a 
distance as Mulder slowly woke beside her. It had 
been a long night for the both of them. Late night 
feedings, new parent jitters, long moments spent just 
staring at the miracle in their arms. She felt as rested 
as she expected to. 

"Morning." Mulder whispered in her ear and pressed 
a long kiss to her neck. "She's awake." He noted as 
he followed Scully's eye line to the wondrous 
movement in the crib. 

"Yeah." Scully said softly, trying, unsuccessfully, to 
hold in a groan as Mulder moved from behind her. 

Mulder placed his hand over the pouch of her belly. 
"Sorry." He said, gently rubbing his hand over the 
soft flesh. 

"It's ok." She whispered. 

He brushed the hair away from her face before 
pressing his lips to her forehead. "Can I get you 
anything?"

"Yeah." Scully smiled brightly. "The baby."

Returning her smile, Mulder leaned down and kissed 
slowly and deeply. He finally pulled away and slide 
out of bed, shivering as the cool air of the room hit 
his bare chest and legs. He stooped by the fireplace to 
add more wood, while Scully slowly stacked pillows 
up on the headboard so she could sit with some 
comfort. Mulder washed his hand before stepping 
across the room and leaning over the edge of the crib. 
"Morning, Sunshine." He said softly, staring down at 
Aeryn's big blue eyes. Carefully he scooped her up in 
his arms. Instinctively the baby cuddled up to the 
bare skin of Mulder's chest. 

"Can I have her?" Scully asked as Mulder sat beside 
her in bed.

As Mulder eased Aeryn away from his chest she 
began to cry from lose of contact. Scully immediately 
cooed to try to quiet her. In a moment she was silent 
as she nursed. Pressing a kiss to Scully's shoulder, 
Mulder set his head down and closed his eyes. "I 
should go get breakfast." He muttered. "You feel like 
eating?"

Scully nodded but didn't take her eyes off the baby in 
her arms. "I think I could eat a little."

Mulder eased a pillow beneath Scully's arm to take 
off some of the weight from the baby. Leaning over 
he kissed Aeryn's head, the slight dusting of pale hair 
tickling his nose. Sitting up he kissed Scully's bright 
hair before once again getting out of bed. He glanced 
up at Scully as he dressed, and couldn't help but 
smile at the way she stared at the baby in complete 
amazement. "Do you want me to tell everyone?" 

Finally she looked up him with a smile. "Yeah. They 
should know."

Mulder's heart was full with pride at being able to 
announce the arrival of their baby. With one last 
smile he left the room. 

Day 251
"You look beat." Skinner said glancing at Mulder 
then back to Amanda and Scully where were talking 
next to the crib, now decorated in handmade 
blankets. Wooden toys and plush animals where piled 
in the corner, all gifts from the people of Nova. 

Mulder shrugged as well as he could from his 
slouched position against the wall. It had been a long 
few days. It seemed every time Aeryn would be 
sleeping and they finally found some quiet time 
someone would stop by to visit. The random people 
would only stay for a moment, but some for an hour. 
The Gunmen came by and it was nearly impossible to 
get them away from the baby. 

Mulder had always been used to functioning on little 
sleep, but usually it was by his choice. Now all he 
wanted to do was sleep for a few uninterrupted hours. 

"Scully looks good." Skinner commented. 

Mulder's head spun around to look at him sharply. 

"I mean she looks like she is doing well after the 
birth. Jesus Mulder, relax." Skinner said with a 
chuckle.

"Sorry." He muttered under his breath, looking over 
at Scully. She did look well. Her body was still full 
from pregnancy, but he could see her naturally 
slender figure hidden beneath the light cushion. 
Mulder preferred her with a little more weight then 
she normally kept on anyway. He smiled as he 
watched Scully pass Aeryn into Amanda's arms. 

Skinner looked over at Mulder with raised brows at 
his yawn. "Maybe we should get going." Not waiting 
for him to answer he stepped up towards Amanda. 
"We should go." 

Amanda looked up at Skinner then down at Aeryn, 
disappointed, but knew he was right. 

"Come by tomorrow." Scully said quickly. "I'll be 
glad for the company."

Mulder stepped up and took Aeryn from Amanda just 
as the baby yawned. "I think it's everyone's 
bedtime." He slowly eased the baby into her crib as 
everyone bid their good byes and left the room. 

"Beautiful baby." Amanda said softly as they walked 
down the hallway. 

Skinner made an agreeable sound in the back of his 
throat. 

Reaching over she squeezed his forearm. "Don't 
worry Walter, I'm in no rush to have kids."

There was a moment of silent. "Who said I'm not?" 
He said without looking at her.

Amanda looked sharply over at him until, finally he 
turned his head and met her eyes. He looked nervous 
and uncertain, and even a little scared. She held his 
gaze for a moment, then smiled. "Come on." Amanda 
said softly, taking his hand in hers and tugging him 
down the hall to her room. 

Day 253
Mulder ignored, for the first time at Nova, whoever 
was knocking at his door. He flat out refused to open 
his eyes even as the knocking got louder and more 
often. He ignored it as Scully buried her head against 
his arm to block out the noise as she too chose to pay 
no attention to it. He ignored it through the calls of 
his name. He ignored it up until the point when 
Aeryn woke up and began to cry. 

"Damn it." He mumbled, finally dragging himself out 
as Scully muttered out something along the same 
lines and went to the baby. "Yeah?" He said as he 
swung open the door, not hiding the fact that he was 
not happy to have been woken up. 

"I'm really sorry to wake you." Alex said before 
Mulder had even finished stepping out the door. "But 
Collin never came back for watch last night."

Mulder stared at him for a moment as his sleep 
clogged mind focused on the situation. "Collin 
should have been back at midnight."

"I know." Alex said softly. 

Running his hand through his hair, Mulder pondered 
his options. "Ok, I'm going to get dressed and we'll 
get a few people together and go looking. Have you 
told Skinner?"

Alex nodded quickly. "I'll get him."

"No. He hasn't recovered enough to do this. Just tell 
him we are going and will check back by midnight 
tonight or assume there is a problem. I'll meet you in 
the Main Room in about ten minutes." Mulder 
stepped back into his room and Scully looked up 
expectantly as she rocked Aeryn in her arms. "I have 
to go." 

"What? Outside?" Scully said nervously. It just 
seemed to get colder and colder lately. Watchers 
were only out for two hours before shifting off 
because it was too brutal out. 

"Yeah." Mulder pulled off his sweatpants and 
stepped into a pair of jeans. "Collin never came back 
from watch."

Scully frowned as she walked over to the dresser, 
balancing the baby on one arm she pulled clothes for 
Mulder out with her free hand. "It's too cold out there 
if anything happened to him. He wouldn't make it." 
She handed him his shirts. 

"We'll find him." He said simply before pulling a 
sweater on over his head. 

"This one too." Scully said, forcefully placing 
another sweater in his hands. 

Even though Mulder was already feeling suffocated 
in his layers of clothes he put the offered sweater on 
to ease her mind. After tying his boots Mulder stood 
upright and looked at Scully were she stood with 
Aeryn held tightly to her, her lips pressed to the 
baby's forehead, and a distant look in her eyes. 
Mulder walked over and pressed his lips to her 
temple, his arms enfolding the two carefully. "I'll be 
ok."

Scully nodded. "Just be careful, Mulder."

Mulder raised her chin gently with his hand and 
pressed his lips to hers. Leaning down he kissed 
Aeryn, once again sleeping. He left the room quickly, 
unable to look Scully in the eye. Walking out the 
door was by far the hardest thing he had ever had to 
do. Part of him, in the back of his mind, screamed 
that this was nature. Being the first time he was going 
to leave his wife and new baby and go outside of 
Nova. But the rest of him, the majority of him just 
didn't want to leave. It didn't matter why, he just 
wanted to stay there with his family like he felt he 
should. To take care of them, to love them, to live. 

***
Mulder could only remember being this cold one 
other time in his life, laying in the Antarctic, wrapped 
in Scully's arms, only able to think of the ship he had 
just seen fly over head, and how close he had come to 
losing her again. Now all he could think about was 
getting back to Scully, preferably wrapped in her 
arms, in bed, warm and comfortable with his child 
sleeping safely across the room. 

But he couldn't. At least not yet, he had to remind 
himself. Him and three other men had been walking 
for hours until they finally split up to cover more 
ground. It wasn't looking good. As Scully said; if 
something had happened to Collin to keep him from 
returning to Nova, he wouldn't have been able to 
spend the night in this cold and live. But Mulder was 
unable to except that and not be able to bring home 
the body for his family. They deserved to bury him in 
the graveyard, with a head stone, with closure. Such a 
seemingly simple thing made the biggest difference. 
It filled that hole in a person's heart. 

Mulder cursed under his breath as it started to snow 
big fat flakes. This wasn't going to help. He could 
barely see through the heavy fall. 

Leaning back against a tree, Mulder stretched his 
arms over his head. He leaned his head back, then 
side to side. Easing the tension of his tired and cold 
muscles. His opened his eyes, head his facing the 
sky. And his heart stopped. 

Three ships hovered over head. Motionless. 

Mulder dropped his arms and stepped out from under 
the tree, moving around to get a better look. 

A roar filled his eyes, one he had heard before. The 
earth shook beneath him. The sky lit with the bright 
colors of an explosion as Mulder tumbled to the 
ground.

Part 48 of 48
Day 253 (continued)
Mulder could feel the cold of the snow burning the 
exposed skin of his face. He knew he should move, 
but his head pounded so hard that it was impossible 
to think about anything else. 

Slowly, as the ringing in his ears died down, the 
popping and sizzling sounds of fires were audible. He 
couldn't hold in a groan as he rolled himself on his 
back, gasping for air as his throbbing body dealt with 
the movement. The large flakes of snow that fell on 
his face were soothing. 

"Scully." He muttered out loud without even 
realizing. With a deep cringing breath Mulder forced 
himself into a sitting position. He pressed the heel of 
his hand to his spinning head. Ignoring the nausea 
Mulder struggled to stand. 

He had to go back to Nova. He must get back as fast 
as he could. It ran through his head in a continuous 
loop.

Bracing himself with a hand on tree whenever 
possible, Mulder started trenching through the thick 
layer of snow on unsteady legs. 

He focused on nothing else other then getting to 
Nova. It three hours away though, three hours before 
the latest two inch snow fall, before a nauseating 
headache. But the motivation he had now was 
completely different then his walk away from Nova. 
That was about finding a body, this was about finding 
his love.

***
The explosion must have been a few hundred miles 
west of Nova, Mulder decided. As he walked east, 
towards his home, the destruction lessened slightly. 
Trees were down everywhere, he hand walked past a 
few of the newly constructed barns, which now lay in 
mostly rumble amongst the snow. 

Even when he was at a distance he could tell Nova 
had crumbled once again. A large cloud of dust 
rested in the sky above Nova, brought on by the 
tumbling of rocks and boulders. The snow now 
falling from the sky was black with soot. The heat of 
the fires had turned the ground into slush, Mulder 
was soaked through and shivering horribly. But, 
thank God, the air was breathable, the sky though 
gray was visible, and he could see Nova. 

Finally Mulder reached a side entrance, only slightly 
caved in. He picked his way through not being as 
careful as he should, but he didn't slow down. He 
couldn't. The heat of the interior of Nova reminded 
him of the lives inside. He hadn't seen anyone since 
he split up with the search group, but not once had 
that crossed his mind. 

Nova was eerily quiet. 

Mulder walked as quickly as his bruised body and 
aching head would allow down a small hallway that 
would intersect with the North Hallway. 

The North Hallway was vacant. Mulder's stomach 
twisted. Ignoring the pain in his body he broke out 
into a run, taking a small pathway that would cut 
across to the East Hallway. 

With one light push his door swung open. 

"Scully?" He called desperately. 

His echo was the only answer. 

Mulder walked over the crib, looking down with a 
mixture of hope and dread, not sure of what he 
wanted to see. 

He saw nothing. 

"Ok." He whispered to himself. "Think logically." 
Mulder left the room and made his way down the 
silent hallways of Nova. 

With a deep breath Mulder turned the knob of the 
Medical Room door and stepped into the lit room. 

"Oh Mulder, thank God you are ok." Judy said 
holding a fussing Aeryn in her arms. 

Without a word Mulder walked up and took the baby 
into his arms holding her close to him, his lips 
pressed to her forehead, breathing in the comforting 
clean baby scent. Aeryn quieted in his familiar 
presence.

After a moment he raised his head and looked around 
the Medical Room, fully expecting to see Scully 
kneeling by one of the many cots. Mulder's eyes 
closed in fear. "Where's Scully?" He asked softly. 

"I don't know." Judy said nervously. "I was in here 
tending to people, no one was hurt badly, just scrapes 
and bruises, so I hadn't sent for her. Then she came 
in, handed Aeryn to me and left. Skinner told 
everyone to stay in their rooms, I figured that's why 
she hadn't came back, but that doesn't make much 
sense."

Mulder looked at her question. Why would Scully 
have left? People were injured, despite severity she 
would have stayed to help. Why would she leave the 
baby? It was all so unlike her.

Realization passed through Mulder, like an ice cold 
fist gripping his stomach. She went looking outside 
of Nova for him. That's what he would have done if 
she had been out there. Left the baby is capable hands 
then started to search. 

"Did she say anything?" He asked in hope. He just 
needed a clue as to what direction she started in and 
then he could find her-he would find her. 

Judy shook her head slowly. "She just said she had to 
go." 

"Oh God." Mulder breathed out, pressing Aeryn 
closer to him. "Can you watch her for me?"

Immediately Judy nodded and reached out to take the 
baby. 

"I'll be back." Mulder said with a lingering look at 
Aeryn before leaving the room. 

"Not again." He prayed softly as he began to jog 
towards the Main opening of Nova. 

He skidded to a stop halfway through the Main 
Room, at the Church door. With a shaking hand he 
opened the door. He wasn't sure why he had stopped 
here, it was just instinctive. But Mulder had learned a 
long time ago, to never ignore his instincts. They had 
saved his, and Scully's neck too often.

Disappointment filled his heart as he scanned the 
chairs, all vacant. As he went to close the door a 
small movement in the far corner caught his eye. 
"Scully." He breathed in relief, even though fear still 
occupied most of his heart. He slowly, cautiously, 
made his way over to her as she crouched in the 
corner; her knees pulled to her chest. "Scully?"

Her head flew up in surprise. 

Mulder dropped to his knees beside her, pulling her 
against him. "Are you ok?" 

Scully nodded, her tears beginning to soak through 
Mulder's shirt. "I was so scared I would be called."

"You weren't?" Mulder asked in surprise as he pulled 
away from just enough to see her face. 

"No. But I was scared I would be. I had to get away 
for Aeryn."

Mulder nodded, pulling her back against him. It made 
sense to him now. She left Aeryn in fear that she 
would hurt her. Scully's worst fear. His too. But it 
didn't happen. Nothing happened. Scully was ok, 
They had left her alone this time. 

"It's ok." Mulder whispered as he rocked her gently. 

"Aeryn." Scully said simply, attempting to move out 
of his embrace.

But he pulled her back to him, not wanting to let go 
of the warmth and comfort her body gave him. 
"She's ok." He breathed into her hair. "I just saw her. 
Everything is ok."

Scully settled her head back on his shoulder. His 
strong arms encircling her, locking out any bad 
thoughts. He was ok. He hadn't been killed in the 
explosion like she feared. Their family, though new 
and small was intact and safe in the walls of Nova. 


Day 400 (About 5 months later)
Scully spread the blanket out on a fairly flat area of 
land, immediately laying on her back. The air was 
still cool from a long winter, but the sun was strong 
and bright, chasing away any chills from the wind. 

Lowing Aeryn to the middle of the blanket, Mulder 
settled on his side looking over at Scully. Her eyes 
were closed, her head tilting back, doing her best to 
enjoy her Sunday off. 

"Hey, where do you think you're going?" He asked 
Aeryn as she rolled onto her stomach and pushed 
herself up as much as she could on her arms. 
Pinching the fabric of her shirt between his fingers, 
Mulder stopped any potential movement. 

Scully lolled her head to the side, partly to see what 
the baby was doing and partly because a ship passing 
over head had blocked the sun's warming rays for a 
moment. "She has your attention span."

Mulder just grinned. With an annoyed look at Aeryn 
he scooped her up from where she was slowly 
inching her way off the blanket and sat her up, 
leaning against his stomach as he lifted himself up on 
one elbow. 

Sliding a little closer to them, Scully reached out and 
gently brushed her fingers through Aeryn's soft red 
hair. 

"What are you thinking about?" Mulder asked 
noticing her far off expression. 

She looked up at him with a shrug. "Nothing and 
everything." 

He nodded, knowing exactly what she meant.

Mulder caught Aeryn with a chuckle as she lost her 
balance and toppled to the side. He rested her head on 
his outstretched arm as he lowered himself 
completely to the blanket. She stared up at him, 
grabbing and reached for anything she could possibly 
get her curious little hands on. Scully watched with 
an amused smile as Aeryn wrapped her small fingers 
around the chain of Mulder's Nova charm. He 
grumbled and carefully untangling her fingers, 
shoving the charm under his shirt. 

After a few moments of silence, Aeryn now content 
with pulling at the collar of Mulder's shirt, Scully 
gently tapped Mulder's shin with her toe to get his 
attention. "What are you thinking about?"

"Same as you." He responded, running his fingers 
over Aeryn's belly lightly, smiling as she giggled and 
cooed. 

Scully laughed softly at the two. "What's the 
`everything' you are thinking about today?" She 
asked to make idle conversation.

"Same as it is every day." 

She raised her eyebrows in question. 

With a slight tilt of his chin, Mulder gestured to 
Aeryn and Scully. "You're `everything'." 

Scully smiled, inching even closer. "And what's the 
`nothing'?"

Mulder jerked his head up the sky, signaling to the 
ships that passed over head all day long. They were 
all but forgotten, but never completely out of one's 
conscious, even during the quiet times like this. "But 
the `nothing' doesn't matter." He said smiling into 
her eyes. "The `everything' does."

"Yeah, it does." Scully said softly, settling her head 
on his forearm, and her hand on Aeryn's belly.



Notes: It's actually over.. 

First and foremost, thank you to Evie for all her 
timely beta work and suggestions and help. Evie 
supported me throughout this ordeal, yelled at me 
when I toyed with the idea of saying to hell with it 
and not finishing Nova, and gave me many virtual 
kicks when I wouldn't be writing when I should. 
Sitting here now, after finishing Nova, I can't think 
of word to describe how grateful I am for everything 
Evie has done. Thank you just doesn't cut it.

Thanks to Evie (again) and Shell who had to listen to 
me whine about Nova for months now =). Just think, 
you are finally free! 

And a HUGE thanks to everyone who read Nova. 
And a bigger thanks to those of you who sent me 
email about it. It always made me smile, especially 
the ones who wrote frequently (you know who you 
are). Without you all I never would have done as 
much as I did. 

Nova, by far, has been the most interesting writing 
experience of my life. 5 months, 182 Word Doc 
pages later I have a fic that I can't believe came from 
my muse. For a long time, as I was writing Nova, I 
thought this was going to be the last fic I would 
write. That's a joke =). So don't worry all who yelled 
at me for saying such a thing, I just don't think its 
possible.

My goal with Nova was invoke emotion. Laughter, 
fear, joy, tears, and hopefully even some sense of 
closure with this story. The only way for Nova to end 
without any possibility of a sequel would be to kill 
everyone, but I can't do that. Never will be able to 
without a huge amount of guilt. I felt Nova was 
becoming stale. I could have kept it going forever, 
but felt it was time to end it. Hopefully you feel the 
same. Please don't flame me if you don't agree, that 
only makes me sad =(. But I would love to hear your 
end thoughts on this fic.

So, once again, thank you for reading. The only point 
for this to be written is for it to be read. If you 
enjoyed this please archive, recommend, send me one 
last praise, whatever you would like to do. Nova is up 
for anything it deserves. 

Thank you.